Last night, I was talking with my best friend about how most of the people with whom I have the greatest interaction and rapport at the moment are people I have actually never met. He pointed out the dangers inherant in strictly URL relationships, and my mind was drawn back to a couple of whom I am aware that married recently. They never met until after he proposed to her, and I worry and wonder because I am not sure about the math used in online dating sites.
For a brief time, I was a member of several online dating sites. I remember from the questionairres, that many of the questions did not allow for accurate reflection of the truth about me. I also remember that there was mention of some Chemistry.com members who were informed they were unmatchable. Some of the math formulas used to put people together may put people together who are poor matches and keep people apart who might otherwise do well if they actually made a go of it.
You can say anything you want online. I refer you to the part of the film Must Love Dogs where the female character creates a series of completely bogus ads. For all you know, I am really a Mongolian Yak herder unless we have ever met, and it is a little dangerous that some people online trust their URL friends enough to take their advice, share personal information, and let IRL relationships languish.
I appreciate the interest of others in my well-being. From family members to the state health program to complete strangers, I am constantly beset by people who think I'd be happier if I were married. I think they assume that single people cannot fathom what married life is like. For my own part, I think it's better to be single than in a bad relationship, and I am not very open to the prospect of blind dates, being set up with a friend of a friend, or allowing Dr. Neil Clark Warren to tell me with whom I might make a good match. People close to me know that even if you are a good match on paper, we might not work out.
Online dating and blind dates are a new type of arranged marriage. Where once you let your parents or the king put you together with someone for some political, financial, or social benefit, now we allow Neil Clark Warren, friends, family, and sometimes other complete strangers to set us on the road to happiness. How are these any more likely to result in happy and healthy marriages, no matter how many of them start because of online interactions?
You probably know couples who met online. Some of them are a good fit. Some of them are less good. If it works for you, great, but for my own part, I prefer to actually meet and interact with the people I know. After all, can you ever be sure of anyone?
**no offense to Neil Clark Warren. I appreciate his efforts. I question his methods.**
For a brief time, I was a member of several online dating sites. I remember from the questionairres, that many of the questions did not allow for accurate reflection of the truth about me. I also remember that there was mention of some Chemistry.com members who were informed they were unmatchable. Some of the math formulas used to put people together may put people together who are poor matches and keep people apart who might otherwise do well if they actually made a go of it.
You can say anything you want online. I refer you to the part of the film Must Love Dogs where the female character creates a series of completely bogus ads. For all you know, I am really a Mongolian Yak herder unless we have ever met, and it is a little dangerous that some people online trust their URL friends enough to take their advice, share personal information, and let IRL relationships languish.
I appreciate the interest of others in my well-being. From family members to the state health program to complete strangers, I am constantly beset by people who think I'd be happier if I were married. I think they assume that single people cannot fathom what married life is like. For my own part, I think it's better to be single than in a bad relationship, and I am not very open to the prospect of blind dates, being set up with a friend of a friend, or allowing Dr. Neil Clark Warren to tell me with whom I might make a good match. People close to me know that even if you are a good match on paper, we might not work out.
Online dating and blind dates are a new type of arranged marriage. Where once you let your parents or the king put you together with someone for some political, financial, or social benefit, now we allow Neil Clark Warren, friends, family, and sometimes other complete strangers to set us on the road to happiness. How are these any more likely to result in happy and healthy marriages, no matter how many of them start because of online interactions?
You probably know couples who met online. Some of them are a good fit. Some of them are less good. If it works for you, great, but for my own part, I prefer to actually meet and interact with the people I know. After all, can you ever be sure of anyone?
**no offense to Neil Clark Warren. I appreciate his efforts. I question his methods.**
2 comments:
Spending time with and being around people is the only way to really get to know them. I don't buy the comparability nonsense either.
I don't see a problem with someone enjoying being single and living life there way.
I choose to be married. It works well for me. I am happy even after 18 years.
Finding the right one for you is the most difficult challenge. I found mine. I hope when you are ready, you will find yours.
I am not single because that is what I wish. I am happy that you are happy and found someone who values your code of honor as your companion does.
I never would have imagined that my moral code and my beliefs would be the most powerful forces that kept me single.
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