Government is Waste

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In case you didn't know this already, here's another example of how the government wastes, loses, or fraudulently dispenses with funds. An audit of the CDC for FY 2007 (yikes! are they that far behind?) shows that the CDC misplaced $8 million worth of equipment, on the heels of a $5.5 million deficit in equipment from their 1995 audit.

Don't worry. None of the vials of anthrax, bubonic plague, HIV, ebola, or any other infectious agent were missing...in 2007.

Into the Storm

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Most people like to hunker down and stay home when the storm winds howl. Truth be told, yesterday was the kind of day on which I, like many other people, would have liked nothing more than to curl up on the couch with a cup of hot cocoa and cuddle with someone I love. I've been hiking many times when I was glad to be leaving the canyon in advance of the storm, especially given the penchance in this region for flash floods. I've also been out and run in the storm before, and I found that I actually run faster when I run against the wind.

Yesterday morning, I was supposed to meet a friend early and go for a morning hike. After I had left my house, I received a text from him saying he felt it was a no-go. Over the past few years, I have had a lot of people stand me up for things, and so I decided to not let their choices impact my adventures, and so I drove undaunted to where I intended to go and simply chose a different path on which to hike, one with other people. Whereas usually I prefer to hike where other people exigent to my group are noticably absent, I thought it prescient to be proximal to people in case there was a problem.

The storm howled in and dumped rain and hail and snow on us as it broke against the mountain in the early cold of the day. You could see sheets of rain sweep in from the west as the winds angrily roared against the stalwart resilience of the mountains in its path. Periodically, its power spent, swaths would open in the clouds that allowed beams of light to pass through, as if God were illuminating a dark cupboard with a flashlight. By 9AM, these penetrations were at the right angle and concurrent with sufficient precipitation to produce rainbows. I retired to the visitor's center to dry off a bit and was able to get some amazing photographs of the rainbows against the backdrop of red sandstone cliffs.

Perhaps it was a bit cavalier. Perhaps my attitude was driven by my recent foray into the tale of The Count of Monte Cristo, in which Mondego's son, when taken by captors, tells them to do their worst. I reproduce the dramaticized version here:
When I arrived in the catacombs I watched as the criminals who tied Albert to a wall and threatened to cut off his finger and send it to his father as evidence of his abduction. The boys reply to all this was, "Do your worst." Life is a storm my young friend, you will bask in the sunlight one moment be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes. You must look into the storm as you shout as you did in Rome. Do your worst for I will do mine. Then the Fates will know you as we know you as Albert Mondego, the man.

People frequently ask why bad things happen to them. Well, life is a storm. The storms rage. The storms don't really care if you're a good person. They were set in motion by things often ignorant of your existence. What makes you a man is how you respond to what happens to you. That's why we remember certain men. Newton and Luther challenged the church. Columbus, Clark, and Armstrong challenged the frontier. Washington, Henry, and More challenged the King. When the storms arise, as they will, sail into them, march into them, and stand against them. They will come anyway, no matter how far you may run or how much you may struggle, and the clouds of strife will rain down challenges upon you. They are not designed to wash you out. They are opportunities for you to decide where you will stand.

The story is told of the foolish man who built his house upon the sand. When the rains came, they washed out his home. Another wise man who built his house upon a rock kept his home when the same rains swept down and threatened it. Set your foundation somewhere firm, steadfast, and reliable, so that when the shafts in the whirlwind threaten they will have no power over you.

And then after the storm passes or as it breaks, you too may see rainbows in the light of a new day, a promise of good things to come.

Dantes' Syndrome

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I have been thinking the last few days about Edmund Dantes, of Count of Monte Cristo fame. It has segued into the concepts of honesty and truth. The tale covers the span of almost 15 years as Edmund's beliefs about truth vanish with his naivetee and then return as he recognizes that the messages taught him in and by prison actually mean something. Of course, it also helps that Edmund gets out of prison, but if he had not, Dumas might not have become a famous author...

Edmund begins and ends the story with a belief in the power of truth and right. His sortie to the island of Elba, his acceptance of the letter from Napoleon, his conversation with Master Morrell, and his admissions to deVillefort all proceed from a belief that he is honest, that he has nothing to hide. Unlike many of the other characters, Edmund is almost always honest about his intentions, and he goes at things with a single purpose in mind. Edmund suffers from Dantes' Syndrome- he expects right to triumph.

Fortunately for him, and probably because this is a story, he is proven right in the end. Right does triumph. Truth breaks through. Even his own personae comes to a realization that God and Truth, the pillars upon which his decisions early in the novel are built, will set things right in the end.

Unfortunately for us, we are subject to the same kinds of antagonism and agonism from characters in our own lives. Dantes is elevated over Danglars for being true, both to the mission as well as the men instead of too mean of a loyalty to himself. Mercedes picks Dantes over Mondego because he loves her for the right reasons. Even deVillefort at first acknowledges that Dantes is honestly innocent, possessed of a naivetee that put him into harm's way. Each of these feels threatened by him and jealous of him however, and finds in him a convenient scapegoat.

Dantes' Syndrome is a belief that people are honest, true and good, that truth and right will always prevail. Unfortunately, it sets up the people who believe therein to be scapegoats, and if they survive in the Chateau d'Ifs of their own mortal probation, many of them fall victim to its close cousin- cynicism. As his close friends and former fiancee try to reason with him to abandon the self-destructive quest for revenge, he resolutely holds onto hate, which has fueled him, because he lost faith in truth despite his association with Farrier in prison.

Perhaps you have noticed that people are often dishonest, selfish, and deceptive. They are capable of the contrary virtues depending on their choices. I think that people rise to meet our expectations, and so as we treat them as we expect them to be, they will fulfill our expectations. This is why I treat the people I know as best as I can and only reluctantly render them acquaintances after a 'long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object'. I have great hope that men can be encouraged to act upon their better natures if we expect them to and let them know we believe in them. After all, as he dies, Farrier tells Dantes that it does not matter if he believes in God because God believes in him.

Dantes' Syndrome has a cure. It is to speak the truth and be true. CS Lewis wrote that if you take away all that is good in man, you are not left with a bad man; you are left with nothing at all. Men can and will be what they feel encouraged and incentivized to be. Children are anxious to please. It is sad that we lose that as we 'mature'. Look for truth. Expect it. That's how we make the world better.

What the story of Dantes teaches us is that truth can and will prevail. Truth is not just the best policy, it is the only policy.

"By the power of truth, I while living, have conquered the universe." --Faust

True Friends

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I've thought about this on this blog before, but I was reading a scripture this morning and wondered how they used that word. Luke 7:34

The Son of man is come eating and drinking; and ye say, Behold a gluttonous man, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners!

We use words today much differently than they would have when the original authors of Biblical works wrote them down, and even still since the time of King James, whose authorized version contains this particular translation. What does it really mean to be a friend, and why might they have used that word? I have noticed as I make a study of word meanings with my copies of dictionaries historical and modern of the English language that English completely rearranges itself almost every century.

Many people I know describe a friend as someone who accepts them who they are. I believe it's more than that. After all, the drive-through operator at Burger King accepts you as you are. He just wants your money, and he is not your friend. He may act friendly towards you, but he is not your friend.

Over the weekend, I lost two Facebook 'friends'. I don't really like Facebook nomenclature very much, because I have some 'friends' who are people I have never actually met. I believe that Facebook has helped to confound society's definition of what a true friend really is.

Christmas Eve, I had a conversation with a female friend from whom I had not heard for some time. The last time we spoke, I called her because I had a feeling that I should, and she brushed me off. She told me that my phone call helped her realize that she was doing the wrong things because I had noticed she needed help. That's what Friends really do. They tell you what you need to know and help you do what you ought, even at the risk of being 'unfriended'.

Some people have no idea what the title "Friend" really means. They bandy it about with reckless abandon, applied to those with whom they joke and who joke about them at their expense, at those whom they snub and who snub them in return, at those whom they betray and who betray them in kind, at those whom they exploit and who exploit them in retribution. They apply it to coworkers and acquaintances, people they barely met and people they barely remember. Yet these people are noticeably absent when they are sick or poor or lonely or hurt. Their 'friends' do not give of themselves unless they are guaranteed reciprocal exchange.

True Friends will differ from the people toward whom you have come to apply that term. They will be at peace even if they smile seldom. They will move quickly, confidently, in the direction of their dreams. They will encourage us, welcome us, accept us, even as we snub, exploit, and betray them. They will largely work in the background. You will think you are being nice to them when in reality they are being nice to you. They will love you more than others do and more than you deserve but they will need you less. They will have time for you anytime, and you will wonder how they manage to make it. And after you have stabbed them in the back, laid waste to their estate, broken their heart, and brought them to the brink of ruin in every way imaginable, they will still come and rescue you when you call, because they are true friends.

You cannot be a true friend until you are true to yourself, and since most people do not yet know who they really are they are incapable of being your friend because they cannot be true to that ephemeral morass in which their soul resides.

Facebook Flashback

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This was my very first Facebook status update, from April 2008

I used to breed beagles. They are my loyal and loving companions, as I believe God intended them to be. I think everyone who wants to have children should raise a pet, but that's another story...

My feelings on the matter remain the same.

Santa's Sleigh

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The gift for which I decided I should have asked for as a kid is Santa's Sleigh. Think about it. For all of our lives, and even more recently thanks to NORAD, we have considered that this man carries enough gifts in this sleigh to give billions of gifts or visit millions of children in all of Christendom within a less than 24 hour period. Plus, if you consider Disney's "The Santa Clause", it also comes with a cookie and cocoa dispensor and is powered by VTOL technology, meaning you no longer need to obtain, house, feed, and care for the antelope that pull it. No other vehicle covers that amount of distance in that amount of time with so little fuel. Instead, Lexus advertises the December to Remember event and what not to sell cars.

Why hasn't anyone ever asked Santa for a copy of his sleigh?

Snow: Christmas Symbol

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For many parts of the world, there is no such thing as a white Christmas. Usually, this is also true of Las Vegas, which, being in the desert, has an average of 3-4" of precipitation per year. However, on the way to work this morning, I could see snow up on Antelope Mountain, Red Rock, and Mt. Charleston, above the 6000' level. After a week of rain, it does not surprise me, and it puts a smile on my face.

Why is snow a significant symbol of the season? It goes back to Isaiah, who, speaking Messianically, tells us "Come and let us reason together saith the Lord, for though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow". Isaiah makes reference to the atoning sacrifice to be made by the Christ as a means to purify and cleanse.

I love snow. Mostly, I love snow in the mountains so that I don't have to drive in it, but I love what it does. Frequently, it is quiet. Usually, it purifies particulates out of the air. It glistens in the sunlight afterwards. It reminds me of great Cristmases in Europe and great family memories in years gone by when I lived at home with my own family. Those were pure times, times of peace and joy. They were times when I was naiive and more innocent. Those were times when it was easier to think of Christ.

We grow up and get more responsibilities, opportunities, and choices. Although many people choose good things, when was the last time you read the scriptures, wrote about Christ, told a friend about Him, or did anything He would have done if He were on earth today? People plan their priorities, and so if you don't make room for Christ, don't be surprised if he doesn't make room for you.

A friend of mine talked with me a few weeks ago about the mercy of Christ. The beauty of Christ, like the beauty of the snowfall, is that his mercy is for everyone anywhere, even in Sin City. It snowed here to please the eye and gladden the heart of the wicked and the righteous alike. Christ came to save all who believe on His name, regardless of what we do. Nobody can save himself, just like none of us can force it to snow.

It really is beautiful up there today. I wish you could see it. I wondered what message I could leave on this blog to echo over the Christmas weekend that would center on Christ, and as soon as I left my house, I could see it in the mountaintops. High on the Mountain Top, a Banner is Unfurled. Ye nations, now look up, it waves to all the world. Two days before Christmas, there could not have been better timing. Let it snow, for in Christ, we shall be purified like that beautiful blanket above.

Merry Christmas.

Christmas Travel Tidbit

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"Grandma got a pat-down at the airport, flying out to see us Christmas Eve. You may think TSA gropes are harmless, but I would opt out if you talked to me."

Noah: His Ark and Covenant

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It has been raining pretty steadily in Las Vegas now for about seven days. I was awake at 2AM this morning when the rain began after a slight pause of five to six hours. This worries me for two reasons. First, because the channel behind my house is now half full of rushing torrential waters and looks more like a midwestern river than a drainage canal. Second, because two of the windows in my house are now leaking. Many of the sidewalks in my neighborhood are under water, and many of the intersections are flooded. We have received our annual precipitation equavalent within the last week. It's evident that home builders in this valley did not build houses with steady rains in mind.

As a consequence, I've actually thought about Noah. First of all, we're about 20% of the way towards the 40 days and 40 nights that it rained. Secondly, I think about rainbows, and God's covenant to protect Noah and his family and never again wipe man from the face of the earth. Strangely enough, and for the first time I can recall, in the face of desert drought, I asked God to stop the rain as soon as possible. I have food storage, but I never had plans to buy flood insurance or build an ark.

Noah's covenant is relevant to the Christmas season. If God had wiped man from the face of the earth, there would have been nobody from whom Jesus might descend, since dead people have no posterity. That would have actually rendered God's promise of a Savior void, and so he couldn't wipe man from the face of the earth without condemning men because of their disobedience and transgressions. Furthermore, we all descend from Noah, which renders us brothers, and makes it ever more important to treat each other that way around Christmas, whether our human relatives believe in Christ or not. Instead of killing everyone, God gave us another chance to repent, and he put a rainbow in the sky.

Several months have passed since I last saw a rainbow. There's also no sign of one in the forseeable future with clouds looming at least until evening for the valley. If they don't stick around tomorrow, we might not actually see a rainbow after this storm, just like we didn't see the eclipse. The rainbow to me is a reminder that God is interested in our salvation from sin, which is a very Christmasy theme in my opinion.

The waters have a ways to go before they really threaten my house. The biggest threat right now is the slow drip in one of the downstairs windows from a poorly seated or poorly protected window. Who knows what will happen? Meanwhile I will trust God, who didn't tell me to build an ark, that where the city has none He has a plan for this type of life contingency.

Perhaps it's a good sign that, around Christmas, I find myself pondering aspects preparatory to and conditional upon the incarnation of Christ. Of all the things to cross my mind, I am pleased with what does.

Merry Christmas once again.

I will be here again tomorrow before they finally do what they should do at work and let us stay home since there are no students here...

Simple Committments Matter

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The story is told of an elite fitness center in a prestigious and large American city. Every year, concurrent with New Years resolutions, the center is flooded with excited potential applicants who want to take advantage of the high success rate the center offers. Despite the high cost of the program, the people figure that if for that money they can reach their goals it will be worth it. What they really hope is that they can buy their way to a weight loss goal.

The center has an ingenious plan by which they deal with a volume of applicants that exceeds their capacity. At the end of the day, when all the other application portions are complete, they send everyone home for the day with one promise they exact of every applicant. "When you get home tonight, go through your entire house and turn all the toilet paper rolls over. If they dispense from the top, flip them so they all dispense from the bottom or vice versa. Then come back tomorrow."

When the applicants return in the morning, the trainers meet with them and ask them if they rotated their toilet paper. Only those who followed that comittment are allowed to continue. The theory is simple: if you cannot keep small commitments, how will you possible have enough follow through to complete an arduous physical training regimen?

Many people ask small things of us to test our committment. I do the same thing, testing you with small things to see how much I can trust you to keep information, promises, etc. For me, if you cannot keep small committments, how can I count on you for matters of life or death or things of eternal significance?

The following poem comes to mind:
“ Father, where shall I work today?”
And my love flowed warm and free.
Then He pointed me out a tiny spot,
And said “Tend that for me.”
I answered quickly, “Oh, no, not that.
Why? No one would ever see.
No matter how well my work was done
Not that little place for me!”
And the word He spoke, it was not stern,
He answered me tenderly,
“ Ah, little one, search the heart of thine,
Art thou working for them or me?
Nazareth was a little place
And so was Galilee.”

If God asked you to move a mountain or make the sea become dry land, you probably imagine that you would be willing to step forward and do a miracle in the name of Christ. However, Jesus asks small and simple things. He asks us to love our neighbors, to forgive when we are wronged, to keep our primises, and let our word become our bond. Simple and small are the things he has asked of us.

Last year around Christmas, I contacted a friend of mine and asked her if I could buy her a fish for her tank. Several of her fish had died in the months immediately precedent, and I knew from infrequent visits that she found joy in her fish. When I finished the question, she almost cried. She told me that she wanted to ask someone for a fish but didn't know how to broach the subject. I met her at the store and bought her two.

Christ asks of us simple things to measure our commitment. To each, he gives at least one talent and then asks for a stewardship report. For all those who do what they can to multiply their talent, he promises that we shall be given many other things. As we keep our commitments, he opens to us new blessings, opportunities, and knowledge.

This Saturday, we will all celebrate the birth of a baby boy. Like all baby boys, he couldn't do much at the time of his birth. Like most baby boys, he was born ignominiously to all but those who awaited and sought his coming. Yet, from the birth of Jesus, much in the world has changed. By small and simple things, great things come to pass, and God often uses simple things to confound the wise. Who knows but that you might do something today that changes the world down the road. As you think about this, consider this Liberty Mutual advertisement, which I have previously mentioned:


If we all do the little things, the big things will take care of themselves. Have a very Merry Christmas.

Christmas Songs

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There are a few songs they play around Christmas for which I care very little. Although some of them mention Christmas, they don't really mention what Christmas really means. Some people might think this an aberrant attitude, but Christmas really isn't even really about family or gatherings or togetherness. If what we do does not bring us to, revolve around, and focus us on Christ, then we have kind of missed the point of Christmas.

Yet, those are the songs people I know sing all the time. I know that for radio stations, it's probably because people who don't like Christ, even if they buy gifts and trees and victuals for family dinners, celebrate the 25th of December as a holiday but not as a Holy Day. They have more power over us than they realize, because people wish me Happy Holidays and sing of Hippopotami for Christmas or Figgy Pudding and gay apparal or getting a date for Christmas, when it's about Christ.

Like many of you, I am familiar with certain traditions. We have a traditional meal, a repetitive program, and the like. Sometimes, the message of the Savior takes a back seat, and that kind of annoys me. I was in a chorale this season, and I noticed that the songs about my Savior were the ones most likely to be omitted or missing from the program, which was selected only in media res by the director. In all the gifts, even when they are few, we do not talk about the symbolism. In all the decorating, we don't talk about why we put on our best or use certain things as decor. In all of our singing and the movies, we do not watch the nativity or sing the religious hymns. In our gatherings, Christ is mentioned in our prayers and then forgotten. What if he were there as a visitor?

I don't really care if you are offended because I don't like the trimmings and trappings, the carols and cards, and the gifts and galas that occupy our time. Christ is real to me. He is the reason I hope for anything. He is the way by which I hope things will be made right. No matter how good I am, without my Savior, I am destined to receive punishments that make coal look like a desirable gift. I choose the songs about Christ and disregard the ones that are not about Him.

A few weeks ago, much to my surprise, one of my favorite parts of the Christmas party I attended was when Rich insisted that we read this play. The play was of course a different dramatization of Luke Chapter 2. After all the food, the fun, and the gifts, I am glad we did that. It took a lot of time, but that's the time of year it is that we celebrate.

I am not really interested in being P.C. I am a Mac. I am not interested in whether you are offended that I celebrate Christmas and celebrate Christ. I allow all men the same privilege to worship how, where or what you may. If you would like to listen to 'holiday' songs, feel free. If you give me the choice, I will sing praises to Him in whom I have my hope for a better world and a place in the kingdom of my Father.

For, unto us a Child is born, a Son is given, and the government shall be upon His shoulder, and His name shall be called: Wonderful, Counselor, the Almighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace.

Hallelujah.

I will do what I can to preach of Christ, to rejoice in Christ, to prophecy of Christ, and to write according to those prophecies, that my children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins and that they may always remember Him.

16 December, 1773

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In September 2009, I proudly dumped my own tea into Boston Harbor as part of my trip to that historic wharf. A few weeks later, the Tea Party Movement would, unbeknownst to me at that time, convene with a series of protests. None of them threw tea into any harbor, and most of them share very little patronage with the event from which they took their name.

From www.u-s-history.com

In 1770, American protests led to Parliament's repeal of the Townshend duties — except for the duty on tea retained by the British as a matter of principle. The colonists demonstrated their displeasure with the remaining tax by drinking smuggled tea. The effectiveness of American resistance was shown in the precipitous decline in tea sales in the colonies — a drop of 70 percent over three years.

Boston Tea Party

In 1773 Parliament passed the Tea Act, which gave the English East India Company a chance to avert bankruptcy by granting a monopoly on the importation of tea into the colonies. The new regulations allowed the company to sell tea to the colonists at a low price, lower than the price of smuggled tea, even including the required duty. The British reasoned that the Americans would willingly pay the tax if they were able to pay a low price for the tea.

On November 28 the Dartmouth arrived in Boston harbor with a cargo of Darjeeling tea. Samuel Adams and other radicals were determined that the cargo would not be landed in the city. His mobs roamed the streets in the evenings, threatening violence if challenged by the authorities. Governor Thomas Hutchinson was equally belligerent and vowed not to capitulate in the face of public opposition as had happened in other colonies.

Two other ships, the Beaver and the Eleanor, arrived with more consignments from the East India Company. Hutchinson remained firm and stated that the cargoes would be brought ashore and taxed in compliance with the law.

The Tea Act required that the requisite tax be collected within 20 days of a ship’s arrival, making December 16 the deadline. Sam Adams kept public fervor high by holding public meetings in the Old South Meeting House; crowds as large as 5,000 clogged the surrounding streets.

At one of these gatherings, a resolution was adopted that asked the consignees to return the tea. Those tea agents, some of them relatives of the governor, refused to do so. On December 16, the owner of the Dartmouth agreed to sail his ship back to England. This opportunity to ease tensions was abruptly ended, however, when British officials denied permission for the ship to clear the port and began preparations to seize the vessel for nonpayment of the tax.

That evening the ship owner reported his inability to depart from Boston to the throng at Old South. With that news Adams gave a signal to the group and loud Indian war whoops broke out. A group of some 50 men, unconvincingly disguised as Mohawk Indians, moved the short distance to Griffin’s Wharf where the three ships were moored.

The vessels were boarded, the cargo carefully taken from the holds and placed on the decks. There, 342 chests were split open and thrown into the harbor. A cheering crowd on the dock shouted its approval for the brewing of this “saltwater tea.”

The “Tea Party” was quickly restaged in other port cities in America and tended to polarize the sides in the widening dispute. Patriots and Loyalists became more ardent about their views.

Parliament and King chafed at the destruction of private property and the deliberate flouting of royal authority. They would soon turn to sterner actions.

the British thought that the colonists would pay the tax if they could get the tea more cheaply with tax than through the black market. They were wrong.

What was the Boston Tea Party really about? The colonists didn't stop drinking tea. They changed the source from which they bought it, which is a very American thing to do. As a matter of fact the Boston Tea Party wasn't about tea. It was about liberty. Nothing the Congress has forced upon us since 2006 is about what it says on its face. It is all about liberty and how fast the Democrat driven government can strip us thereof. Under the leadership of Pelosi and Reid, they are intent on doing as much damage as possible before they are replaced. This is another example of the totalitarianism in which they believe.

Elitists in both parties, but primarily among the Liberals, conspire together to strip us of our liberty and protect each other as they act as the tyrants they are, but they are acting without the consent of the governed, without respect for the law, and without regard for the ramifications on generations as yet unborn. They are at least, if not more, as much enemies of freedom as King George III and the ilk that defended the Townsend, Intolerable, and Stamp Acts of his time, among other usurpations.

How can they write a 2000 page law in a week? This has been on tap for a long time. The efforts are aimed at the individual. Like I have been saying for about a year or so, you will always have too much money and too much freedom according to Liberals until you have none at all of either.

Fortunately, I am pleased to report that after I left work yesterday Reid pulled the omnibus pork bill from the agenda. Watch today for him to get up and bellyache about how evil the Republicans are. He will 'clothe himself with odd old ends stol'n forth from holy writ and seem a saint when most [he] play[s] the devil" (Richard III). He does not care one whit what you think or want. That's why Reid needs to go.

A better Christmas present could not be requested by the American people.

Someone With Skin On

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I have noticed that frequently in the darkest times of my life, there is nobody around to be my friend. Sometimes, I make phone calls and seek help, and sometimes I don't call people because I know they have work early in the morning or other problems of their own. When, therefore, I know someone who's having a rough time like yesterday, I call them to make sure they're ok.

My faith sustains me largely from day to day. I hope for a better world, even if that world is one for which I have to wait until I am dead. In the depths of despair, however strong my faith may be, it sometimes helps to have someone there with skin on, someone you know hears what you say and sees the pain in your face and hears the fear in your voice because you can guage their reaction. Your faith is after all not knowledge; it is faith.

Maybe that's why people think I'm a great person. I am the type who can be sitting at his desk filing out a calendar or answering emails or rifling through the cabinets and think, "I should email so-and-so about such-and-such" and go do it. Within the past few weeks, several people have told me that I contacted them when they needed it most. I just responded immediately to something that seemed small and easy and didn't come at great personal cost.

Other courageous conversations have not been as easy. Last summer, I finally felt like it was time to set a close friend straight. For 21 years, nobody had told her what she really needed to know, including her own father who admitted as much to me, and so, as inexpertly as I am prone to do, I told her what I thought she ought to know and do. I haven't heard from her in almost 10 months now. I told her because I thought I would be a piss-poor friend if I didn't tell her what I honestly thought.

My rationale for this is simple. I believe that the Holy Ghost whispers to men and either testifies of truths as they hear them or reminds them of things they already know. Unless someone with skin on tells them something, how can he remind them of things they have not heard? Whether they realize I said it or not, what matters most is that when they are ready to hear it that they respond correctly. I decided 12 years ago to be that vessel. It's been lonely.

When I go to my place at night, there is nobody there with skin on. Fortunately, this is so because nobody has decided to surprise me, possessed of a key or not, upon my arrival. Frequently I while away the hours in books or recently on the piano I received as a gift. I appreciate that sometimes I get to be that person with skin on to other people who wonder if anyone else notices or cares.

God loves us and he watches over us, but it is often through another person that he meets our needs. --Spencer W Kimball

Choose to be the miracle. Choose to be God's hands.

Fighter and a Lover

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Since I am surrounded by people who know Harry Reid and periodically although infrequently meet someone who actually likes him, I ask them why. Today I heard someone say they support Reid because he 'fights for the things in which he believes'. Wouldn't it be nice if people who opposed Reid did that? Oh wait. Some of them did and have. We just had an election after all.

The problem with using Reid as an ensign to would-be challengers is that Reid is a man without conscience. How can a man in good conscience do things that benefit himself and hurt other people? Well, it's very simple. It's easy to remove responsibility when you remove choice from the equation, and it's easy to victimize others if they are not real to you. Reid spends very little time at Sidewalk Level, and so he is able to do things that hurt you because he does not know you and therefore you are not real to him.

I wrote a few weeks back about how people are able to commit crimes only when they dehumanize the victims. The Goebbels Propaganda Machine was very good at renditioning the Jews as subhuman in order to garner general support for genocide. When Reid comes to speak or hold a dinner or do anything, it is almost always by invitation only. He has no intention of meeting real people with real problems. You are beneath him, and therefore anything he does is justified because you are sub-Reid, and therefore sub-human.

The problem with a fighter at your head without morals is that he is like a bull in a china shop. Many revolutions have been bloody for the body politic because the person willing to lead the charge was a person bereft of morality, responsibility, and ethics. That was how France ended up with the Robespierre's Reign of Terror and how the Bolsheviks ravaged Russia in similar fashion. If you read Edmund Burke's defense of the American revolution and indemnification of the French, you can see that his primary objection was a lack of honor, civility and morality on behalf of the participants. In America, the revolution was backed with principles. In France, it was backed by the guillotine.

George Washington made a great figurehead and cemented the colonies and later country together because he was a man of principle. You want a fighter who is also a lover, a lover of righteousness, of principles, of his fellow men, and of his creator, whatever he believes that creative power to be. Few could honestly argue with Washington, and most trusted him. There was a time when "Washington has given his word" actually meant something.

We do not need a Harry Reid to fight for America, his 'extensive' boxing experience notwithstanding. In the arena of ideals and idealists, Harry is a philosophical light weight. He takes away with his left hook what he has given with his right. He will bloody you if it will advance him. He epitomizes that which Thomas Paine opined in organized government:

Some writers have so confounded society with government, as to leave little or no distinction between them; whereas they are not only different, but have different origins. Society is produced by our wants, and government by our wickedness; the former promotes our happiness POSITIVELY by uniting our affections, the latter NEGATIVELY by restraining our vices. The one encourages intercourse, the other creates distinctions. The first a patron, the last a punisher.

Harry Reid is not the Society I seek. He is government. Give me a fighter and a lover. Give me a philosopher king. Give me a Guardian, a strong man who fights not for power or pelf or because someone leads him or because he likes to fight but someone who does it because it's the right thing to do.

Petition to the OED

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My best friend regularly uses words in common parlance that necessitate a trip to Merriam Webster. As you may know, I purchased three reproductions of dictionaries held in Thomas Jefferson's Monticello library as a means to understand how he means words. In "Pay it Forward", the teacher encourages the students to look up words they hear but do not know and inculcate them into their vocabulary. I would like to publicly thank Ms. Paula Naegle, one of my high school teachers, for her valiant efforts that helped ingrain words into me that rendered me more eloquent and helped elevate me over the din of vulgarity.

I was dismayed to learn this year that the Oxford English Dictionary has included or mentioned the inclusion of so much slang in its new edition. Like other common commercial concerns, it has become interested more with sales of books or access to online versions than with preservation of the language per se, and risks rendering itself a useless resource for those interested in and acquainted with actual scholarship. As a follow on to an article I published earlier this year, I write this petition to the OED.

Dear Sir or Madame:
About an hour ago, my friend shared a word with me that I did not know. The talents imparted to me by Ms. Naegle and subsequently gleaned from voluminous reading of antiquated books empowered me to guess at its meaning but in so doing created a situation where I coined a new word. My friend typed 'skillfulhedron', which means to be artistic in the sense of many facets. I asked him, "Is that like a paragon, talentially speaking?"

'Talentially' is, thus far at least, not a word. It is, however, grammatically correct. Unlike the 'ish' constructs of the more common vulgate, or terms like 'chillax', which made the OED this year, 'talentially' is consistent with all the techniques of verbiage imparted to me from the days of my education in the parochial schools of my youth to the days I finally perused the tomes of Tennyson and Talmadge. Strictly speaking it seems less talentially evident to coin a word by the omission of parts of two separate and distinct ideas into a compound hybrid than to apply the rules as written in the creation of new albeit as yet heretofore unused adjectives and adverbs as seen in the words 'chillax' and 'talentially' respectively.

I am, I assure you sirs, no wordsmith. I do not intend to remake English. What I do intend is to fight for its correct application, accusations of the British against citizens of their former colonies notwithstanding. It has been a problem, apparently, generations in the making. Add a word to your tome that is actually a real word, not something cobbled together from fragments of fallen phraseology. Add 'talentially' to the OED. Thank you.

Saving the World

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There was a time when I wanted to save the world. I remember being eight and wishing I could be superman. My brother liked spiderman at the time. When I finished college, I thought I'd get into research studying cancer or Duchesne's Muscular Dystrophy. After a while, I just wanted to save myself.

Someone said that people who aren't liberal when they are young have no heart. I have always been liberal. I just don't believe I have any right, power, or errand to FORCE a liberal way of life on other people. Yet, most liberal behavior is on display so that they can be seen of men to care, and therein they have their reward. As a matter of philosophy, I believe that it's part of the adult transition to want to matter, to want to 'save the world'. Eventually, most of us realize that we can do something to help someone, and that it will most likely go unnoticed by those who are not directly affected.

People who really know me know that I'm a Christian. People who know me also know that I have been subjected to some of the most un-Christian behavior by people who claim they are better Christians than I. What did Christ really do? He 'went about doing good' and 'increased in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and man'. Christ didn't do what he did to get noticed. As a matter of fact, he repeatedly admonished his followers to keep quiet on the matter. He went and did what he did because it was the right thing to do, 'yet we esteemed him as naught' and he was 'smitten and afflicted' until ultimately with his stripes we were healed. When he had 'free time', he prayed, studied, and spent time with friends. He just lived a good life and took time to improve himself so that he would be of more use to his Father.

If you want to save the world, first make yourself a better person. If your religion has not made you a better person, then it matters very little which Faith you adopt. And if you are a better person to be seen of men, well, that is your reward. Remember that superheroes attract supervillains.

As a final thought, I take this scene from "A Man For All Seasons". When Richard Rich begs Thomas More yet again for an appointment at court and More tells him to be a teacher, Rich complains that nobody would know what difference he made.

Sir Thomas More: Why not be a teacher? You'd be a fine teacher; perhaps a great one.
Richard Rich: If I was, who would know it?
Sir Thomas More: You; your pupils; your friends; God. Not a bad public, that.

By their fruits, they shall be known, and by good fruits, however small, the world can, will be, and was saved.

Questionable Conclusions

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My students, coworkers, and close friends know that I am wisely skeptical of scientific claims. Today, I read in Science Magazine, one of the premier journals, that you can fight hunger or cravings simply by thought. The implications of this are enormous, and the conclusions are likely poorly founded.

One of the biggest problems with any study published in Science is that this journal suffers from the same malady as Facebook status updates. It allows notification with such brevity that it precludes the chance for clarity. When you submit to Science, you have a page limit, and so it is very rare for any figures, data, etc., to make it into such articles, let alone any real science. Most articles in Science are nothing more than "what we think/want this to mean".

According to the article "Thought for Food", if you imagine that you have eaten a food it has the same effect on the body as if you actually consumed it. The implications of this are great for the obese, because you can imagine you ate an entire bag of M&Ms without eating any and feel satiated. I think that's too simple. For how long does this psychosematic effect endure? What about the destitute? Can they be satiated as if they actually ate basic sustenance without eating any? What of physiological markers and after effects? The mind is powerful, but the mind cannot supply the energy or nutrients or chemiosmotic effects provided by those foods or other consumables. Many food fetishes are actually addictions.

While this particular study does include statistics and sample size, I do not think it is groundbreaking. I can hardly imagine that the 51 participants in five experiments can be extrapolated to the 300 Millions of Americans or 6 billions on the earth entire. Fifty one people is, quite frankly, statistically insignificant. It is however better than the 'oats lowers cholesterol' study, which involved only five people. Who is to say that there are not other psychosematic effects involved since the participants must have known they were not actually eating the foods involved, rather than in blind taste tests where something IS actually consumed?

My problem with the article is in the conclusion. The conclusion is in the title. The title is what politicians will take and use to bludgeon us. If, God forbid, our economy continues to crumble, instead of Marie Antoinette's famous death knoll to 'let them eat cake' when they ran out of bread, our politicians will tell us that we can just imagine we have some as if that will suffice. "Imagined Consumption Reduces Actual Consumption". Hmm... Even if that is true, for how long, under what conditions, and with what foods? I refuse to accept that premise. The people were not starving or hard up for money. They were given cheese and chocolate for crying out loud.

I have told my students for years that science never proves anything; it merely removes all other alternatives until only the truth remains. The conclusion represents a common misconception of actual scientific method. At best they could claim that 'imagined consumption exerts a psychosematic effect that seems to reduce actual consumption of certain foods in otherwise healthy adults'. Real experiments do not prove anything. They either disprove the null hypothesis (that imagination has no effect on actual consumption) or fail to disprove it (there was insufficient evidence to show that imagination of consumption affected actual consumption), but that does not mean they have proved anything. It only means they have disproven the opposite of that which they suppose to be true.

What next? Imagined peace increases actual peace? Imagined copulation reduces actual frequency of intercourse? Imagined wealth reduces poverty? Where will this end?

Bad science, Science. Shame on you.

"Ish" Constructs

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Tuesday night, I was talking on the phone with my best friend. He asked me when I intended to retire for the evening, and, to my utter horror, I said "soonish". You may have noticed that the rising generation has begun using the 'ish' construct. Most of their applications are completely slang, and I was a little annoyed with myself that I have allowed that corruption of the language to rub off on me.

The first time I recall saying 'ish' without it being a word I had actually learned in school was summer 2009. My same friend asked me how I was that day, and, having just heard an advertisement for a business on the radio, adapted the name to my state of being and replied that I was 'wellish', meaning 'pertaining to a state of wellness'. Since then, I have studied the origins of this phraseology and determined that although it is correct, the people who apply it apply it generally incorrectly and in a way that annoys me.

Addition of 'ish' to a word in English is very common. It first came into use during the Shakespearean era, being used as a suffix to add to the end of nouns to render them into adjectives. Thus, 'reddish' came from 'red', 'English' came from 'Engles', and 'foolish' from 'fool' to imply either an actual state or an approximation for use of description or comparison. However, the suffix 'ish' can only be added in the case of an adjective. This makes my use of 'wellish' correct when I say "I am in a wellish mood today" but not when I say "I feel wellish today" because the latter is an adverb isoform.

How and why does this become a problem? The current generation is fixated with the 'ish' isoform of words. They use it as part of their spontaneity, to sound cool or vogue, but mostly because it is slang. Here are some I have recently heard that are incorrect:

I don't knowish.
We will start around noonish.

The first is a verb. The second is an adverb because it revolves around time. The second is also redundant because 'around noon' would mean the same as 'noonish' (if noonish were a word).

With verbs, it's a problem because it's non-committal. You cannot be ambivalent about an action or state of being. Either you are driving or breathing or you are not. There is nothing 'like unto breathing'. You are either on your way or you are not. There is no half-measure.

With adverbs, it's a problem because of a similar reason. It lacks commitment. "Around noonish" can mean any time whatsoever, and the rising generation are not known for punctuality or reliability. I try very hard to be around five minutes early for things. Most young people are 15 minutes late or more. To me, 'noonish', even if it were a word means, 'within 10 minutes either way of noon'. When they say it, I know they won't be early, and it becomes an excuse to be however late they please. "I told you I'd be there around noonish." "It's two-thirty." "So?" You come that late, you steal my time.

This summer I started a book called "America's Syndrome- a Corruption of the Language." If Henry Higgins thought it was bad in the film 'My Fair Lady', he would be even more appalled today at the cold bloody murder of the English tongue. For years, I have been saying that there is an exception to every rule in English except for this one. That's what makes English so difficult to learn and use and why it is one of the worst languages in which to communicate. English is one of the worst languages in which to communicate because it obfuscates meaning, omits detail, ensnares the senses, misleads the mind, and expresses nearly enough to any number of putative interpretations that you can say almost anything and mean either everything or nothing at all depending on how recipients take it.

Since the Oxford English Dictionary has decided to add 'lol' and 'wysiwyg' and 'sick' (meaning cool or hip) to its lexicon in their slang forms, it is clear that the OED is no longer an authoritative repository of how English should be used and simply an interpretive tool to describe how to understand it. They are more interested in the commerce associated with the work of selling the dictionary than they are at scholarly security of true expression and language. Learn to use your language well and keep the good habits of expression you have, or at least give it your best effort. Language well used is one of the last bastions of civilization.

Criggo.com

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About a year ago, an old high school friend of mine posted a link to a post on Criggo.com to his Facebook page. I felt pretty low that day and went over to check them out. Criggo keeps snapshots of newspaper advertisements, articles, and addenda that contain humor. Sometimes the excerpts are purposely humorous; often, it's punny, situational, or errors that make the posts so funny. I check back with them frequently for a good laugh.

My first visit, I spent about 30 minutes browsing their website. I rarely laugh out loud, but my normally somber and focused coworker looked over to make sure I wasn't high on nitrous oxide or something. I needed a good laugh that day, and I got it.

Not all of their posts are laugh out loud funny. Some of them are sad commentary on society or intelligence or just people in general. Yet, I routinely laugh about the things submitted to or found by the editors. I have now been through all of their historical archives, and when I feel especially low, I search through them for a while and remember good laughs from last year.

They say that laughter is the best medicine. While it has not healed my state of mind or rectified the wrongs allowed by the universe to be perpetrated against me, it has, as promised by the Hope of Israel, made it easier to bear and bear with them.

Here are a few recent ones that I enjoyed:



As you gear up for Christmas, I wish you joy and good cheer. Criggo helped me last year, and if nothing else can, maybe they can do it this year for you.

Merry Christmas

If You Insist on a 3rd Party...

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For those insistent on a 3rd party, you could have at least have been as creative as this guy who has given the most concurrently substantive and entertaining argument for a 3rd party yet:

Preference or Conviction?

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Over the past few years, I have been frequently disappointed by people. They have told me that they value or stand for such and such only to make choices that show the complete opposite. As I wrestled with an answer for this, I came to the conclusion that their words were declarations of things they value but not necessarily of values they already have. People are willing to stand for and go after a lot of things as long as it doesn't cost them anything.

When opposition mounts, the sunshine saints, fairweather friends and parade patriots shrink back into the shadows. It's easy to stand for what you 'believe' when you are surrounded by like-minded individuals. It is hard, when you face a Moreish trial and stand before Parliament, condemned to the block because you will not sign a document and let King Henry VIII do whatever he pleases.

What these people actually mean when they say they stand for something or appreciate or value it in me is that it is what they prefer. Given an ideal world, that is what they would like to have be true. However, there are powerful forces in this world arrayed contrary to what should be, and they pressure other people to prefer particular points of view rather than the ones they honestly mean. I am routinely criticised for being honest and telling people what I actually think. I learned years ago when I was married that if I am going to be in trouble no matter what that I might as well be honest up front, because then I am at least true to myself.

While preferences change with time or circumstance and break under pressure, convictions strengthen under pressure. I absolutely love Sir Thomas More. Besides the dramatization of his life in "A Man For All Seasons", I also bought the Last Letters of Thomas More and Statesman and Saint, both of which detail the facts upon which the former film is based. I would like to think that if we were peers, this man and I would have been contemporaries if not friends. Like Daniel of Israel under Nebuchadnezzar before him, he refused to worship the King's law as if it were divine.

Conviction is what you believe when there is nobody else to ask and everything to lose. Your convictions are the things you really believe, the things that matter most to you, and the things on which you are, like Daniel and Thomas, willing to bet your life. They are tested, tempered, and tried by the following phenomenon:

1. Family Pressure
Your family is often your closest confidence. They are those you have trusted and loved from the time of your first cognisance. You try very hard, especially if you are Christian, to please them and bring honor to them. However, as Abraham can tell you, not all parents or parental and familial wishes are good and brave and true. Abraham's father worshiped idols. Perhaps your parent breaks other laws of morality. When your family brings its weight to bear against you, it can be a difficult situation. While you love them and respect them, you also love yourself and value things that perhaps they do not, either because they are not willing to value or are unaware of things they should value. Family pressure has broken many wills of people I know and for whom I care, and it is a tragedy of the highest order to hurt someone while you tell them you love them.

2. Peer Pressure
For many youth, which is the primary age bracket with which I have thus far largely interacted, a major source of affirmation and confirmation comes from their friends. For adults, it comes from affiliations in employment, recreation, and religion. None of them know what is best for you, because none of them know you as well as you know yourself. Also, they frequently have things contrary to your actual happiness in mind, because if you join them in their decadence, they feel validated by a large group of like-minded individuals. Depending on age and the strength of other relationships, peer pressure can be incredibly strong and break what we might feel to be a conviction.

3. Government Penalties
Penal codes, threats, and military action have been tools of fear against men since the dawn of government. Like Thomas Paine so eloquently wrote, the origin and rise of government stems from an inability of moral virtue to govern the world. Men of morality infrequently desire to rule. Ergo, many of the edicts, penalties, and fines imposed by governments are harsh, punitive and feared. Ask anyone you like what they feel about the IRS. Most people will go to any length to avoid punishments by their governments.

4. Threat on Life
Sometimes you will find a John Hancock, Samuel Adams, Daniel of Israel or Thomas More who will resist wickedness in high places under threat of death. Most people, if they are intellectually honest with themselves, want to live and let live. The government holds power over life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, and it can easily and frequently succeeds at breaking convictions through threats on life. Aside from government, other forces threaten your life, which is why we fear guns, the mafia, pirates, gangs, car accidents, poison, global warming, and a slieu of other threats, both real and imagined that paralyze us against doing what we know we should and honestly choose otherwise.

Your convictions are not things that change with fads, friends, or informatics. Your convictions are a reflection of the things you really value. When everyone around you tells you that you are wrong and you stick to your principles anyway, then and only then do you know that the convictions are your own. It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but it takes a great deal more to stand up against your friends. You care about them and believe they care about you. If they really care, even if they disagree, true friends will love you and stand by you no matter what you do.

For my own part, issues of virtue and morality are not so ephemeral that they are subject to change as if parts of my wardrobe or vocabulary. They define who and what I am. Naturally, I also prefer them, but I have been willing to lose a lot for the things that I believe. It has been hard, and I wish that I could tell you that the rewards were obvious and plentiful. Sometimes, the only advantage is that, as I did last night, I get a good night's rest and get out of bed recharged for another day. At the end of the day, I have to live with myself. I am the only person with whom I spend twenty four hours per day, and if I am not true to myself, how can I be true to anyone else or live with myself?

I will be true, for there are those who trust me.
I will be pure, for there are those who care.
I will be strong, for there is much to suffer.
I will be brave, for there is much to dare.

I will be friend to all, the foe, the friendless.
I will be giving and forget the gift.
I will be humble, for I know my weakness.
I will look up and love and laugh and live.

Most people are alive, but only those who stand by their convictions, even if it leads to their death truly live. Stand by your convictions. Although in the moment it may cost you friendships, romance, wealth, power, freedom, or security, in the end, it is he who acts with integrity of heart who wins a place in our hearts and history books.

St Niklaus Tag

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I love the concept of St. Niklaus Day. Since I cannot incorporate it into my 'family', I share it with you so that you can incorporate it into yours.

Many Germanic nations celebrate this day, usually on December 6th, as the day on which Saint Nicholas traditionally brings gifts to the family. It is celebrated with a family dinner of traditional germanic foods, during which St. Nicholas leaves gifts for them in their shoes, which they have placed somewhere near the door or hearth. After dinner, the guests see what 'Santa' brought and then they work together on a family craft.

My first December in Austria, I was privileged to celebrate this event with the Krompass family of Upper Austria. They were a farming family, but we had a nice beef roast (Saurbraten), received a few small trinkets (mostly chocolate, a pair of woven socks, a scarf, etc.) and then we assembled tree ornaments made of straw. For the past many years, the family had fashioned these ornaments in the shapes of snowflakes and stars with guests. As a consequence, their Christmas tree was very simple. After that, they opened gifts from family.

The purpose for this was profoundly and succintly described to me. A woman told me that "Christ's birthday was so important that even St. Niklaus paused to celebrate it". Wow.

I love how the Germans separated the gifts from the birth of the Savior. Only, it seems, in America, do the traditions of gifts overshadow the celebration of the Christ. Perhaps it is a consumerist-driven phenomenon. In my household, it is not and will not be. I love to sing the songs and read the stories and serve other people this season. The glamour of gifts wore off years ago, initially when I started to receive things that I needed rather than having whims fulfilled. The mission and mercy of my Savior however remain, throughout the year, because I think of it far more frequently, especially when the tinsel and wrappings are gone.

If you are looking for the true Spirit of Christmas, you need only drop the last syllable, and you have the Spirit of Christ.

My Life: An Experiment

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Many years had gone by since the last time someone told me they couldn't be my friend because of my Faith. When it happened to me again this summer with someone for whom I deeply cared and who is old enough to be an adult, I could hardly believe my ears. Yet, for five months now, I have heard nothing from this friend. It is small solace to know that I was true to myself and did the very best I could.

For many people, 'your best effort' really is enough. For some reason in my case, I get set up as scapegoat or saint, and people wait with baited breath for me to fall from grace so they can point out that I'm not that great of a guy after all. I really try very hard to be on my best behavior, but even my sister can attest to the fact that sometimes I curse and sometimes I have a chip on my shoulder. It takes a lot of effort to do your best all the time.

So most people adopt a series of dramatis personae which they don at will to satiate the expectations of the different socio-economic groups they frequent. This past summer, my close friend told me that I 'wear my hat well', meaning that I wear, as far as possible, only one hat everywhere. I am myself wherever I go, without shame, without apology. Take me as I am, especially if you want or verily EXPECT me to return the favor.

Here's one of my favorite quotes on the topic:

If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for what we really are. --"Captain Jean-Luc Picard"

People always want to be accepted for who they really are without having to return the favor. Their conscience absolves them of any responsibility for their past while allowing them to drag up anything from yours whatsoever to justify the double standard. Sometimes, even my parents and friends tell me that I may have to change pieces of who I am in order to find friends or found a forever family. I know I'm tough to live with. I'm not like most people. I don't do what most people do. I don't like what most people like. I live differently, and I live how I like. When I take a 'family' vacation, everyone in my family gets along and has the same tastes. I know because I'm the only member thereof.

Trusted friends talk of rebranding me to make me happy. They invite me to things outside my interests. I have to sleep with myself, and if I am not true to myself, how will I be happy being a pretender? Shakespeare told us that if we are first to our own self true then we will be true to every other man. Someone told me to spend my life living happily and that such a life would attract people to me who share and enjoy the same things. Most of my close friends I have actually met on accident. People like me don't find people like me on purpose, so I pursue the things I control that make me happy. If you're interested, I welcome your company along the way. I do this knowing that it is quite possible that the only people who will be able to put up with me are those who have no other choice. I also however know that people who are my elder esteem me greatly and think and hope for me that my stars and fortunes will change.

I trust that if I am wrong, my Maker will tell me and help me correct my path. Since he remains silent, I will continue to be myself. I don't really know any other way to be. And if I'm going to be damned in the end, I might as well be damned for being what I really am.

Isaiah's Scourge

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Isaiah 28:18

And your covenant with death shall be disannulled, and your agreement with hell shall not stand; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, then ye shall be trodden down by it.

For much of my adult life, I have argued that the scourge that we expect before the final times is not an STD like AIDS. AIDS does not kill quickly enough to desolate or overflow; it doesn't actually kill at all, opening the door for other pathogens to do that work for them. I have identified a new candidate for Isaiah's Scourge today which originated in the same place as many other scourges of man- the Plain of Sodom and Gomorrah.

The bacteria is called Acinetobacter baumannii, and it was first picked up en masse because of combat wounds in Iraq. According to researchers, as you can see in this movie from NOVA, it has several dozen antibacterial resistance genes located overlappingly at a single locus. The logistics and mathematical probability that so many genes can exist in the same place simply by virtue of frameshifts, transcription factor attachment variations, or reversal of transcription machinery beats the odds of the toughest of Vegas Casinos. It is almost as if A. baumannii were made to order to kill in a violent and ruthless fashion.

I find it almost laughable that Terrorists may manage to kill us because of where they live rather than because of what they manufacture. For a few major reasons, they have not yet been able to unleash bioterror onto the United States. Firstly, the people upon whom they rely for delivery are not educated with how to deliver, and it's unlikely that they will convince the educated to be vehicles of delivery. Secondly, it is very difficult to introduce a bacterial agent effectively against the US military. There are much easier ways to kill us, and the fear alone of a biological agent has created enough reactionary response in the U.S.A. to negate the need to actually use one. Often, fear of a thing is worse than the thing itself. We have splendid men and women in uniform and in lab coats working hard to prevent or mitigate anything they might actually deploy against us.

Meanwhile, we transport a bacteria all around the world which is capable of taking down people who are otherwise moral and healthy. Unlike AIDS, baumannii can infect people like me who do not engage in intercourse of any kind, simply if I touch a doorknob infected therewith. Considering the overall ill basal health of Americans, it can take us down without Al Qaeda having to fire a shot or stab a single citizen with a hypodermic.

The reason why I think baumannii might be the scourge or a harbinger thereof is how it's actually put together. Geneticists dream of being able to pack so much information into a single locus, because if that were really possible, large genomes such as in humans wouldn't actually be necessary. It would allow them to make a single insert and then manipulate the insert for any kind of gene therapy. It would make genetics cheap. It would give them a TON of power. The NOVA piece talks about only one donor, the strain of pneumoniae that causes Legionairres Disease, but that locus is a donor and not the locus we actually see. This is the most fascinatingly interesting and complex segment of DNA I have ever seen, and that is what makes it so brilliant and such a viable candidate for the scourge.

Heaven forbid it ever share that with another bacterial strain, especially with one we consider as yet innocuous.

December to Remember

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Last night, I received my first Christmas gift. Sure, I have a harmonica and two guitars, and I play a smattering of other instruments, but not many people actually own a piano because they're pretty pricey. The piano isn't a Boesendorfer or anything spectacular. It's an upright, and it's out of tune, but it fits exactly where I envisioned it in my house, and now my place seems just a little bit more like a home.

I will honestly say I am glad to see 2010 go. When the year began, I really felt like things were going to come together for me, and for the first half, I could hardly believe my luck. Some serious things have hit me in the back half, and although I have come out without too many setbacks, the damage has been done, and I am left to deal with it as best I can.

A close friend of mine said Monday that she is surprised that my life just keeps getting more difficult. I told her that made perfect sense to me. Lately I had realized that my life is hard because I choose campaigns that are difficult to champion. It's simply a matter of this: I prefer to live by my own standards than those of someone else, because I have to sleep with myself every night, and I actually get a good night's sleep usually because I was true to myself and my principles even when everything else goes awry.

So, how do I make this a December to Remember? No, buying gifts won't do it. It's also not about who is there. Odds are, no matter what else happens, I will wake up Christmas morning completely alone. I have accepted that. However, what I can do is change what I do between now and then. Yesterday I posted about never being too busy to stop; I remember two Christmases ago driving past the mall as a huge automobile collission occured. If I see that this year, I can stop and check on folks. I can continue to sing in this chorale to which I was invited even though I'm not really sure how I got invited to sing with the members since we don't really know each other. I think I knew one of them before. I can be dependable at work, a friendly neighbor, a visible presence in stores I frequent for the harried cashiers and give them a kind word, and I can fill my evenings with things that matter like piano, reading, errands, writing, yard work, etc., and I can talk to my family more.

Make this month a December to Remember.