Last night, I received my first Christmas gift. Sure, I have a harmonica and two guitars, and I play a smattering of other instruments, but not many people actually own a piano because they're pretty pricey. The piano isn't a Boesendorfer or anything spectacular. It's an upright, and it's out of tune, but it fits exactly where I envisioned it in my house, and now my place seems just a little bit more like a home.
I will honestly say I am glad to see 2010 go. When the year began, I really felt like things were going to come together for me, and for the first half, I could hardly believe my luck. Some serious things have hit me in the back half, and although I have come out without too many setbacks, the damage has been done, and I am left to deal with it as best I can.
A close friend of mine said Monday that she is surprised that my life just keeps getting more difficult. I told her that made perfect sense to me. Lately I had realized that my life is hard because I choose campaigns that are difficult to champion. It's simply a matter of this: I prefer to live by my own standards than those of someone else, because I have to sleep with myself every night, and I actually get a good night's sleep usually because I was true to myself and my principles even when everything else goes awry.
So, how do I make this a December to Remember? No, buying gifts won't do it. It's also not about who is there. Odds are, no matter what else happens, I will wake up Christmas morning completely alone. I have accepted that. However, what I can do is change what I do between now and then. Yesterday I posted about never being too busy to stop; I remember two Christmases ago driving past the mall as a huge automobile collission occured. If I see that this year, I can stop and check on folks. I can continue to sing in this chorale to which I was invited even though I'm not really sure how I got invited to sing with the members since we don't really know each other. I think I knew one of them before. I can be dependable at work, a friendly neighbor, a visible presence in stores I frequent for the harried cashiers and give them a kind word, and I can fill my evenings with things that matter like piano, reading, errands, writing, yard work, etc., and I can talk to my family more.
Make this month a December to Remember.
I will honestly say I am glad to see 2010 go. When the year began, I really felt like things were going to come together for me, and for the first half, I could hardly believe my luck. Some serious things have hit me in the back half, and although I have come out without too many setbacks, the damage has been done, and I am left to deal with it as best I can.
A close friend of mine said Monday that she is surprised that my life just keeps getting more difficult. I told her that made perfect sense to me. Lately I had realized that my life is hard because I choose campaigns that are difficult to champion. It's simply a matter of this: I prefer to live by my own standards than those of someone else, because I have to sleep with myself every night, and I actually get a good night's sleep usually because I was true to myself and my principles even when everything else goes awry.
So, how do I make this a December to Remember? No, buying gifts won't do it. It's also not about who is there. Odds are, no matter what else happens, I will wake up Christmas morning completely alone. I have accepted that. However, what I can do is change what I do between now and then. Yesterday I posted about never being too busy to stop; I remember two Christmases ago driving past the mall as a huge automobile collission occured. If I see that this year, I can stop and check on folks. I can continue to sing in this chorale to which I was invited even though I'm not really sure how I got invited to sing with the members since we don't really know each other. I think I knew one of them before. I can be dependable at work, a friendly neighbor, a visible presence in stores I frequent for the harried cashiers and give them a kind word, and I can fill my evenings with things that matter like piano, reading, errands, writing, yard work, etc., and I can talk to my family more.
Make this month a December to Remember.
1 comment:
Yay for a piano in your home -- for me it's a must and I think it makes such a difference.
And you are making a difference in many lives. Keep on keepin' on.
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