Are We Not All Beggars?

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When I took my maternal grandfather out once in his car and used his handicapped placard to park near the building, I felt guilty. Of course it was justified as he was no longer able in his late 80s to move quickly or well, and when people who recognized him saw us, I could tell they were not venom on me. We make accommodations because we should, because it's a small thing we all can do to help others. However, not everyone wants to share, and not everyone who benefits from it needs it or uses it honestly. The reason this causes a problem is because it puts a black eye on those who need them and creates enmity between those who need it and those who can afford to give it.

Every now and then someone uses these privileges unjustly. When my hiking buddy and I visited Zion National Park a few weeks ago, there was a plethora of handicapped parking, and he joked I hope about getting one because his father genuinely qualifies. However, I'm not comfortable with that. I work with a woman who is the campus administrator's secretary who abuses the privilege to her benefit. She drives two different cars which she alternates, both of which are registered out of state, and both of which have handicapped placards. I know they are not for her. In the summer when parking was plentiful, she parked at some distance from the door in order to avail herself of one of the few shady spots. Now that school is full bore, I see her parked in normal spots early and then in the handicapped area after lunch when parking is a premium in order to be close to the building. I am ready to report her for violating the law since she is a state employee, but only because in addition to this she was awarded Employee of the Month a few months back, and I don't like the message that sends.

On Tuesday, I learned that as part of Diversity Week, there is a seminar on the accommodations made and how they either help or hurt the handicapped. I told a friend of mine who has some significant physical reductions, and she composed the following guest commentary. It's helpful to remember that we do not really understand them because we can't walk a mile in their shoes, particularly those who cannot walk at all. It is important for us to consider them and involve them in the decisions. It is important for us to advocate for them. They are after all our families, our friends, our neighbors, and fellow children of God. If we love Him, we feed His sheep. If we really believe, then we look out for the fallen and the needy like Christ did and like Christ taught the Good Samaritan did for the man brought low physically. If it's appropriate, it's something in which we ought be anxiously engaged.

Being disabled in America is sometimes a lot more difficult than people realize. Most people don’t understand, and if it’s a visual disability, they stare. It’s generally not a quiet or unnoticeable stare, no it’s as if you’re a monkey in a zoo. There are handicapped spots, and yet, there are more people in those spots that don’t need them than people realize, and if that many people do need them, maybe have colors depicting the severity. Also if you’re a young handicapped adult, older adults glare at you, as if you don’t belong in those spots because you are not age appropriate. Most things are posted as handicapped accessible, but if you really pay attention, it’s not quite. Stores are particularly difficult to navigate if you’re in a wheelchair, seeing as they are either too tightly packed so there’s no way to really move a chair, or those electric doors never work. There are handicapped stalls, as is the law, but general population of people will use them. It is of course acceptable for someone to use the stall when none other are available, but if there are six other stalls open, it’s rude.

While people hold it against you when you receive government assistance, they don’t realize, that little amount doesn’t even cover rent. There are locations that will take what little amount you have of course, but they’re horrible places that no one should have to live. So if you don’t have someone to assist you, you’re stuck living in a poor living situation or being a burden on someone else. The sad part about that is, because you’re disabled and unable to work, you can’t even get out of that location. There are those who will get uppity about that and say find work that you can do. Well, that’s the funny part, because most of the time jobs can only be so understanding about your physical ailments. They can only be so understanding about the amount of time you have to take off because of pain that’s outside your control. Another reaction is others can do it, why can’t you? There’s the thing about physical disabilities, some are similar to one another but that’s it, each are different in their own way. In this instance, you can’t win either way, you either get to live in poor conditions or be a burden on someone else, or you can’t keep a job because your body refuses to cooperate under the guidelines work requires.

Can you imagine how that feels to someone? Most don’t even think about that, because why would they, this is an individualistic country. Everyone is out for themselves and they’re not worrying about others around them, especially when half of them can’t even survive themselves. While yes other countries have it so much worse, why does that matter? Other countries are not your country and your country is the one you should worry about. The sad part about it is, it won’t change.

The same people who complain about dependency turn a blind eye to the disabled. We do things that are easy- build ramps, put up placards, dedicate spaces, but do we do things they actually need? I know it's tough. I have also like you been given lip by someone who thought I was being patronizing. So, most of us ignore it. Most of us don't really know how to help, but if, like today, someone from that community asks us to advocate and tells us what we can do, the onus is on us to do so. You know, even if you can't see them, most people are burdened somehow. I know many students on campus are on drugs, and although they aren't considered handicapped by the ADA, they are carrying a secret burden too.

I appreciate Tara's perspective on her living situation. I think one thing we could do to help them is to restore the concept of neighbors and neighborhoods. Far too many of the disadvantaged generally live in squalor- places I would never visit let alone live- partly because their ability to provide for themselves does not afford them a chance to live elsewhere. I've known Tara for more than 10 years, and she's always lived beyond her means because the SSI disability isn't enough. She turns to her family; they could do more. What about us? Are we neighbors? Are we friends? What do we really do for others? Do we just help strangers or do we help people we actually know like Tara? Last year, when I sent her $500, her boyfriend was very upset; he felt threatened, but eventually he understood that I was doing this because I was taking advantage of an opportunity to be her neighbor. Are we not all beggars?

Let's not just be neighbors in the sense of having property lines that happen to collide. I have good neighbors. My hiking buddy does not. He told me months back about how the children of another resident broke into his car and stole his climbing and hiking gear. When I am away, mine report strange cars in my driveway, even though that strange car is my mother checking the mail and making a quick walkthrough while I'm at my brother's in UT. Just north of my neighborhood, there is a section plastered with "Neighborhood watch" signs, but every Wednesday and Saturday morning there are people who patrol the neighborhood and dig through the garbage for things they can sell/recycle/use. Nobody really watches out for anyone, so why should we expect anyone to look out for the unfortunate? We are concerned with ourselves. "At least they didn't rob me" triumphs over "what can I do to help?" Take back your neighborhoods. Get to know your neighbors. Look out for them. Reach out to them. Help people you know.

Each of you knows someone who could use your help. Each of you has the ability to help in some way. Sometimes the only help you can afford is a listening ear, but sometimes that's all they need. When they need an extra hand, a bit of advice, or something more expensive, you can be the miracle in the lives of people you know. Everyone carries heavy burdens. What really matters in this world is what we do for and with other people. "You've had my powers for a week," Morgan Freeman asks in Bruce Almighty. "How many people have you helped?" Besides the beggars, the homeless, and the like, if we ignore people we actually know, are we really helping? Our charity towards people we don't know remains largely imaginary while our enmity towards our neighbors remains wholly real.

Jesus taught the ultimate lesson on this. Are we not all beggars? Do we not all have needs? Do we not all have means? If our means meet the needs of others, surely the means of others can and will return and meet our needs. For your listening pleasure, remember the parable of the good samaritan and ask "Who is my neighbor?" Let us review the concept of neighbor and neighborhood and endeavor to know and care about those in our sphere of influence, whomever they may be. Do likewise my friend.