During High School in Florida, I was mentored by a man named Grant. He was in his mid 30's, single, and working in a career. The leadership of our congregation put him together with us as a scouting leader to help us learn things from him. Now I know why. When my congregation decided to ask me to teach Sunday School for the same age bracket, it dawned on me that I am their male mentor. I have become Grant to these kids.
The called me to this position because I'm an adult without any kids. Most people, particularly men, have children by now, and so they act and talk as if they're experts on everything under the sun. I suspect that they try to act as surrogate parent to the kids in high school age during Sunday School at the time when they are trying to assert their independence and adult identity. After school, sometimes I would go hang out with Grant. I remember we played Risk and Stratego and Axis and Allies. Later he exposed me to video games about war and history and strategy. He would come over to my house and do the same. My parents were glad I had a positive male role model I trusted who was someone they trusted.
They called me because I'm close to these youth in many ways. Owing to my age, I'm not TOO far removed to not relate, but I have enough experience in order to help them. I can pass on things that helped me and discuss things with them that I wish I'd known when I was their age. As a college professor, I'm used to interfacing with people close to their age, and I can give them useful advice for the choices they will soon make. As a professor, I'm in close proximity with their peers. We ironically have a lot in common. Some of the kids play instruments I play. Others read books I remember. A few are even interested in science. All of them are intelligent even if some of them have poor marks. They remind me of me.
They called me to help keep these young people around, to help keep them from rebelling.
I am not a threat. If they take my advice, wonderful. If not, it won't cause me apoplexy. We don't live together, we don't hang out together, and so we don't have to interact outside this class unless they choose to. In troubling modern times, as so many of their peers rebel from their parents, I'm another adult, another trusted person, with whom to share ideas, time, and concerns. I don't have an ulterior motive, an agenda. I don't win anything for doing a good job, and if I do well, I probably won't ever know. Young people are often more insecure, alone, unsure, and desperate than they let on, so having a somewhat older male mentor may help them, to guide them, to instill confidence in them. I know that it helped me to have Grant around. When my dad was away doing military things, Grant was there to go along camping, to watch out for me, to entertain me, and to expose me to wholesome things.
When I was a teenager, God provided me with an older male mentor in his 30's. I have now become that for these kids. I wonder whatever happened to Grant. I hope that he eventually found someone special and had a family of his own. If his work with me is any indicator, he made a fantastic father. If not, he made a marvelous mentor. I have the interesting and surprising legacy to pass on what I learned, to be that from which I benefited, by taking Grant's place in the lives of these young people. I've become Grant. I hope it helps them as much as he helped me.
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