Due to circumstances beyond my control, I arrived a few minutes late to my 2PM class yesterday afternoon. Consequently, some other things happened that usually don't fall between the cracks, and I ended up forgetting to turn off my cell phone. It's my class policy to have no cell phones in class, and so I unceremoniously removed the battery and continued on, but not before some students heard my ringtone.
After class, one of them asked me if they had heard what they thought they had heard. My ringtone is Darth Vader saying "I find your lack of faith disturbing", and it's been that for a long time on purpose.
Very often in my life, I lose heart without any reason to other than I fear things might not go well. I have no evidence that I'm the problem, that I'm the target, or that my fears will even come to pass. Perhaps it's because the media seems more concerned with what a GOP candidate MIGHT do than they are with what their incumbent already did, but I digress. We may be conditioned to expect and anticipate bad news, partially because it's not acceptable to celebrate our own successes. In these times, sometimes my phone will ring, and Darth Vader will actually call me to repentance.
I know that was not Vader's intent. He's not actually talking about the same kind of faith, but when I hear the phone ring, I ask myself if I am following the path of fear or faith. When my faith is lacking, it disturbs me enough. Over the past several years, as I have prayed and shared my concerns with my Maker, I have felt impressed that if there was a reason to worry, He would tell me directly and not through some supposed surrogate or superstitious supposition.
The ringtone reminds me to look to first sources. We rely far too much on secondhand information. I may have already cited this verse, but it's still prescient:
"Who is this that darkeneth counsel by words without knowledge? Gird up now thy loins like a man...and answer thou me (Job 38:2-3)."
When I worry needlessly, I ask myself whether I have reason to believe this and what message the information I actually possess conveys. Sometimes the information I have isn't accurate or sufficient, but if you make the best decision you have with the information available, that really is the best you can do, and you can sleep easy.
I keep the ringtone as a reminder. Without faith it is impossible to please God. By faith Moses led the Israelites across the Red Sea. By faith, Peter left his net and became an Apostle. By faith, Elijah called down fire from heaven. By faith, Joshua defeated Jericho without swinging a single sword or shooting a single arrow. Faith precedes the miracle, and so I use this to remind me to find or foster or forage for faith amongst the information and experiences I possess.
During the immediate instance, it may be difficult to choose faith. When surrounded or beset, the troubles loom large and the blessings fade into the background of our lives and memories. At those times, sometimes my phone literally rings, and a smile crosses my face as I choose faith, and that disturbs my enemies.
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