Bucket Lists

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There's a really good reason why I have a bucket list. No, I did not see the film of same name, but I realized about a year ago that I had accomplished almost everything I wanted to do with my life in 30 years. When I made it ten years ago, I had no idea that I would be single and childless and able to go and do whatever I pleased whenever I felt it appropriate, and so many of the things on it are things where I never thought I'd have time, motive or opportunity if my life had turned out the way I originally planned.

I enjoy a new birth of freedom with the end of the month of July. Sure, it was an EXTREMELY rough month, but many of the things that hung like a shadow over everything I have built are now completely gone. So, I'm back to planning my trips to Israel and Japan, to Alaska and Lincoln Nebraska, because I can.

A former Facebook friend of mine has this as his favorite quotation, and in general I agree with the sentiment:
Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
-Mark Twain

The premise is to go out and experience and enjoy life. I believe that God created this world for our use and enjoyment, with things to catch the eye and gladden the heart. That's why I often go out stargazing or sit in the driveway and watch the sun set. There are so many amazing things to see that do not come via URL.

My life may not be where I imagined it to be, but I remain the master of my experiences and choices. The life I choose is not just my choice, so I took control of the things where the choice is entirely up to me. If and when the time comes for me to be what I choose above all else, I will be uniquely educated, experienced, and endowed to be the best father I can be because while I waited I didn't just burn time, I invested it.

Make a bucket list, and then go do some of the things on it this year. Your life will never be the same.

GOBNet Poisons the Well

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One of the greatest things for me growing up was that every few years because my father would be transferred by the military, we got to start over fresh. New people, new strategy, and new environment were all possible without anyone there to poison the well against us. It was both bane and boon, as I will attempt to describe, because wherever you go, there are 'natives' and 'transplants', and the natives, who form the Good-Old-Boy-Network (GOBNet) are responsible for damage wherever you go.

All growing up, I wished I could have lived in one place. I don't have old friends, but I also don't have old enemies. As I've lived in this town for three years now, I see that it can be very clannish and snobish, that those who have been here all their lives or for generations (Vegas is less than 100 years old, so they aren't THAT native) snub those who came here new. They naturally and rightly so prefer the company of people with whom they share a common bond built of experience and circumstance. When I have a problem is when they exclude you because you're not one of them and include others because they read the 'right' books, date the 'right' people, attend the 'right' venues, and live in the 'right' parts of town.

Even more egregious is when they actively undermine you. When you come into a new place, they don't have any dirt on you (except via Facebook now which is a veritable mine of data people can garner about you without having to actually speak to you), so they can't poison the well against those who are already here. They can however poison the well against you with any other transplants who come in your wake. After all, the GOBNet knows because they've been here for a long time and they've known you longer, allbeit a week longer in some cases.

Most of the relationships in which I've ever been (romantic and benign) were undermined because stupid people poisoned the well. Friends or family have told girls towards whom I had affection that it was a waste of time or that I wasn't what they wanted. They either told half truths or whole lies, both of which are typical GOBNet tactics to assault character when they cannot argue substantively. Others have undermined vocational, educational, intellectual, and social relationships because I was 'too patriotic', 'too frugal', 'too smart', 'too awkward', 'too dour', 'too bearded', 'too Mormon', etc., in order for any interaction to bear fruit.

Why do they do this? You and I ask this question a lot. First off, I find that people who are uncomfortable with me are uncomfortable at the core with themselves. Everyone wants to be accepted for who they really are without having to return the favor, and most people don't know who they are or maintain multiple true but seperate personas in order to ingratiate themselves in different social circles. I am myself all the time, and people can't handle that. Secondly, the GOBNet poisons the well because they are jealous. Most of them want friends or dates who won't expect much from them. They can't stand that you accomplished something more than they did and without their help or permission! They don't like themselves, and so they don't like that you are better than they are. Maybe you're not better in every way, but if you are better in the ones that throw stark contrast on what they have not yet accomplished, well, the GOBNet can't have that.

Almost all of societal ills come from selfishness. The GOBNet wants to accomplish but does not want others to accomplish anything more than they do or without their help. They know what they want, and they want it now. Unfortunately, when innocent people drink from the poisoned well, it also colors their perception of us. The other day, a friend of mine lamented this trend:

It is very disappointing that the mistakes of others and the baggage they leave us with shapes other peoples opinions for years to come. --Wil Dixon 28 Jul 10

If you want to know about me, ask me. Then when you are convinced of what I am, hold onto it through all the gales and mighty winds that come upon you to break that opinion apart. If you doubt my faith in Christ, my patriotism, or my moral fortitude, then you do not know me very well. Come watch me worship, read what I write, look at what I hang on my wall and watch how I treat women, and if you still believe what you believed when they fed you kool-aid, then nothing can convince you. I am an ordinary man, but I am a man, and I really am what I purport myself to be.

And when you find a poisoned well, cure it.

Be Slow to Judge

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I wish there was a better way to do this, but I wanted to share this video with you. It's a poignant reminder to us to be slow to judge and ask more questions.

View the video here:
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=125696274123574

This video is suitable for all audiences as far as I know.

Pull the Plug on the Volt

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The news today tells you only part of the story. According to the talking heads, Nissan and GM are in a 'price war' with their new electric cars. Why, if it's such a good idea and so many people clamour for it, should they get into a price war? Price wars ensue when companies have to compete for business. They are good for consumers, no matter what Obama says about how bad it is to have so many business entities. If we demand it, more companies will produce it, which will create competition for our patronage. There's more to it however than that.

Reality is, there is not much demand for these cars. I don't know about you, but I'm not in a hurry to go out and spend $41,000 to buy a sedan. Maybe if I wanted to buy a Suburban, but not for a status symbol like this. It amazes me how much you have to pay now just to show you care about "saving the planet".

Chevy Volts have a lot of problems. First off, they run on batteries which are a very inefficient storage medium and very heavy and expensive to replace both fiduciarily and environmentally. These batteries are so bad that the car goes only 40 miles on a charge, which means I would have to charge it while at work just to drive home. Backup gas tank gets 375 miles, and the fact that they have one is basically a tantamount admission that most peopel rely on gas to get where they are going. Do you want to charge the car for three or four hours every time you drive somewhere? You have a 20 mile maximum radius on batteries. This car is the most expensive Chevy on the road. Our administration announced that it comes with a $7500tax credit, which is tantamount to an admission that nobody wants one.

Obama touts this as a major effort while he ramps up his effort to ban coal. How will we get the electricity with which to charge the car if they ban coal? Las Vegas generates a large portion of its energy via coal burning power plants about 10 miles north of town at Apex and 50 miles further at Hidden Valley. Wait until you see the electric bill skyrocket from plugging in your electric car! How will we get that extra energy? From more coal burned out at those power plants. Moreover, if you have to run your Air Conditioner in our 108-115F temperatures right now, that is sure to impact the maximum range. There is still a long way to go and some real tough questions to ask about how to do this right before electric can take hold.

Furthermore, who's to say that something better than an electric car will not come along in the meantime? That’s why I haven’t bought into BluRay. I am not convinced that something else won't come along before they stop making DVDs that is better, cheaper, and more to my taste, and so I'm in no hurry. Knee jerk reactions almost always lead to mistakes. Pull the plug on the volt. Nobody wants one.

To Them Ascribed be Honor and Majesty...

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Lindsay Lohan, 24, gets her name and face all over the news because she finally went to jail. There are some other names we ought to remember instead.
Justin Allen, 23
Brett Linley, 29
Matthew Weikert, 29
Justus Bartett, 27
Dave Santos, 21
Chase Stanley, 21
Jesse Reed, 26
Matthew Johnson, 21
Zachary Fisher, 24
Brandon King, 23
Christopher Goeke, 23
Sheldon Tate, 27
are all Marines that gave their lives for you this week. Honor THEM by reposting this..

In August, 2009, I mentioned a few more I know, living and dead, who gave their lives, or at least part of them, to fight for you.

Joe P E-4 USA (KIA-Iraq) Armor
Carole S E-3 USA (WIA-Iraq) MP
Blake S E-3 USMC Infantry
Blaine D E-5 USMC Infantry
Kristina R E-8 USN Engine Room Control
Brian G 0-3E USAF(WIA-Columbia) Intel
Paul W 0-5 USAF WSO
Matthew A E-2 USMC Communications
John W 0-1 USA Infantry
Matthew H 0-3 USAF ABM
Casey B WO-2 USA Helicopter Pilot
Russell G E-7 USN Seal
Arthur S E-9 USMC (WIA-Vietnam) Infantry
Peter K E-4 USA(WIA-Afghanistan) MP
and others too numerous to mention...

Updated 22 February, 2010

Jay Q 0-1E USA Sniper/Medic (WIA-Panama)
"Tex" S 0-6 USAAC Pilot (WIA-Korea)
William D E-3 USN Submariner
Tasha J E-5 USN Communications
Michelle S E-5 USA Mechanic
Jay A E-3 USMC Infantry

Hey Soul Sister

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I don't know exactly why, but this song makes me feel happy. The beat is simple, the lyrics aren't really important, because all I need to hear are the first few notes before he starts to sing and my mood immediately lifts. Anyone who tells you that music doesn't affect us deceives himself.

Here it is for your listening pleasure:

If You Want to Know, Ask Me

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There's a lot of gossip and hearsay in the world. There are also a lot of people who depend on other people to deliver them information. Whether they rely on news or actually delegate people to go out and find details, the more stops between the source and yourself, the more the data is likely to be skewed. Remember the old telephone game made recently famous by the Oreo Cakester ad where the boy ends up with the message "Billy has his first chest hair" instead of "Billy has an oreo cakester".

Recent events in my life have been 'exciting'. People have wanted to know details about them. Some of those people ask people who know me instead of asking me themselves. A few weeks ago when someone asked my father about me, I told him they should ask me. Since then, he has deferred them to me.

For the past several months, I have argued a lot with people who like Glenn Beck. I am glad he has inspired them to read, but his books are filtered access to information from first sources. Most of the people I know who have read Beck's books (I haven't read anything he wrote) have decided they don't need to actually read first source material. They rely on Beck's interpretation. Last week, a friend of mine asked me where I got the "Rebellion to Tyrants is Obedience to God" seal on my blog because Beck is using it for his online university. I told him that it was Franklin's suggestion for the Great Seal of the United States. So far as I know, Beck uses it without attribution.

If you want to know something, ask the source. We got in the bad habit in school on tests when questions asked us to read a passage and then tell the testator what the author was thinking. I always thought it was more relevant to ask the author than to ask me. I didn't after all write the passages. If you want to know something, ask the first source. They have all the details, in context, with supporting material. Some of them may lie, but at least then the news reaches you without a bunch of filters through other people. If you want to know something about me, ask me. Don't ask my relatives, my friends, my coworkers, my enemies or people who have never met me. To me it makes more sense to ask me.

What Really Matters

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For years, I have known the following poem. It is one of my grandfather's favorites, recited for the first time about a dozen years ago at a family reunion.

My Mother Says
My Mother says she doesn't care
About the color of my hair
Or if my eyes are blue or brown
Or if my nose turns up or down
My Mother says these things don't matter.

My Mother says she doesn't care,
If I'm, dark or if I'm, fair
If I'm thin or if I'm fat
She doesn't' fret o'er things like that
She says these things don't really matter.

But if I cheat or tell a lie
Or do mean things to make folks cry,
Or if I'm rude or impolite,
And these things really matter.

It isn't looks that make one great
It's character that seals our fate.
It's what's within our hearts you see
That makes or mars our destiny

And that's what really matters.

For years, I have made it a veritable crusade to do only what matters. There is however concurrently a campaign in my life to convince me to do things that don't really matter. I am everything women say they choose except 'rich' and 'hot', both of which are illusions. They often ignore the good things I do to focus on the beard or on the type of car I drive.

Well-meaning friends lecture me about a change in packaging. If I drove a different car or wore different clothes, I would attract girls, but not necessarily the kind of girls I want to attract. My friends think I need to sacrifice my values to get a woman so I can sacrifice more of what i want to keep her happy and then give up everything else for children.

Friday when I spoke to a close friend, he told me I was easy to sell. Unlike some people who have to 'clothe themselves in odd old ends stolen forth from holy writ' (Richard III), I actually have things to back up what I am and what others think me to be. If my hair or clothes don't really matter, why do people harp on it? I am a man of great character. I never claim to be perfect, but I do my best with what I have.

Eventually, people choose to be with people who really offer the things that matter. When all the partying and games are over, men and women choose the best person they think they can find. I chose a long time ago an honorable life over one that is financially successful or full of fame. That's what really matters to me.

What matters to you? If you haven't thought it out yet, I recommend it.

Firemen Nextdoor

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I awoke this morning to a strange combination of sirens and dog barks. From the upstairs window, I could see firetrucks, paramedics, and the police in the street adjacent to where I live. One house over and two houses down (like a Knight moves in Chess), a home had caught fire somehow, and emergency personnel had responded.

Things calmed down for me fairly quickly. Once the dogs were out of their kennels, they were fine and just sat on a mound of dirt and rocks while they took it in. Neighbors looked on from balconies (the streets were all blocked off by police), and the firemen got to work, even though smoke was still billowing from the home when I left for work two hours later.

I go by this house all the time. The people moved in a few months ago when they bought it as a foreclosure, and they seemed nice albeit quiet and withdrawn. If it had been one of their adjacent neighbors, I might have been more excited because one of them worked for my parents on their house and the other is an elderly retired policeman with whom I have frequent interactions as he and I cycle the same route at nearly the same time among other things.

I was impressed with the response. True, I live in a relatively quiet part of town, but we did have a really bad T-bone collission a few weeks back at a bad corner and a murder a few blocks away last week, so the emergency personnel were probably bored, but they were there and they were about their business calmly and promptly. Glad as I was that it was not a fire where I lived, I felt good to know that so many people might respond that quickly.

My experiences with emergency personnel have not exactly been glowing. The fire station where I worked the polls in 2006 was full of condescending men with attitudes. I've never actually met a cop I liked. Last time I needed emergency medical care, the British paramedics didn't notice I had a dislocated jaw that healed improperly. However, when you need help, it's nice to have someone there.

I hope those people are ok.

Housing Still Stalled

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Despite what my realtor asserts, Housing has stalled again, just as I expected it would and predicted. Thanks to the Wall Street Journal, there is evidence of that. Even as realtors here keep homes from me and try to incite bidding wars, they don't seem interested in actually selling a house even as there continue to be supplies on the market.

Why does the Las Vegas housing market suck? This article mentions a variety of reasons. According to a figure in the article, we have 63 months supply of homes that have lost 22.4% value in the last quarter alone in a city with 14.2% unemployment and almost 23% of home loans in arrears. There is no reason for people to move here. We have nothing for them to do. Our governor has opposed extension of unemployment benefits. The jobs Harry Reid claims to have saved are all gone. The president tells people not to come here and spend money when our economy rests largely on tourism. Vegas is dying.

Beyond that, there are government programs that cause problems. The housing credit expired, and we saw in the wake of that a decline in home demand, which revealed the increased demand was driven by the tax credit and not as a sign of recovering economic conditions.

I have seen what I believe to be unethical behavior as well. I have seen homes disappear off the market when I was the one pestering the listing agent for a key. I have had realtors try to engage me in bidding wars. I have seen homes mysteriously disappear from the market after a day, just as I was enroute to see it. I am almost fed up. Add to that, sellers have hiked 5-15% onto the previous prices to reflect a 'recovery', and I'm not buying it. I like some of these homes, but not enough to pay that much extra, which is part of why I turned a short sale I really liked back over to Chase last week, because they wanted $16,000 more than I offered. Really?

Honestly, I am buying a home because it will cost me about the same to own one as it does to rent. The advantages are that the house would be mine and that I could own it for about what it cost brand new. I like my privacy, I like my dogs, and I like to have a garden, which just aren't likely in an apartment. Also, all of these homes are a better deal than the one I bought in 2003 and sold in 2005. I don't need a lot, because I am single, but I would like to have something that is my own.