Last night, I went shopping on Thanksgiving Day for the first time since I was married, and I felt like I was committing a cardinal sin. Truthfully, I felt like I was breaking the Sabbath. An hour or so ago, I spoke with my paternal grandmother who told me that when she was my age there was no Black Friday. They lived in a simpler time, a time that was superior to ours in many ways I feel, because it was about different things.
America is old enough and changed enough that we're starting to break with the foundations of our past. In the four hundred years since the Pilgrims landed at Plymouth, our culture, our values, and our demographics have changed dramatically. What interest do immigrants from the Baltic States or Latin America or the Caucuases have in the plight and principles of religious pilgrims? As our people change and their interests shift accordingly, the old ideas and traditions we once knew give way to new ones. This is the nature of history, and truthfully and to our blessing we have kept ours longer than Rome kept hers and longer than any other nation kept anything other than the Windsor branch has kept the Monarchy.
Things have changed. I understand that companies wanted to get started early because Thanksgiving comes later this year than in outer years. I understand that in a struggling "economic recovery" businesses are desperate to garner whatever they can to make ends meet. I understand their interest in bringing in customers. I hope other people understand that for my part Thanksgiving sounds and feels different than it did when I was a child.
Although I'm not that old, I remember when Thanksgiving involved things far afield from making lists of how to tackle Black Friday shopping. I remember eating and playing and discussions with family. Partly, our traditions changed because we moved around, and although I moved away first, I'm the only one who lives proximal to my parents. By the time I arrived, my parents had already done their shopping online, and since I live simply and alone, I don't really have much that interests me. My toaster, which lasted ten years since my wedding, died this week, and I always buy new jeans because they're on sale and never sell out in my size, but most of what I buy this time of year is stuff I buy anyway because I need new clothes for work or tools for projects. I look at the ads and proclaim aloud, "look at all this stuff I don't need". That's the point.
Our commerce and our culture have changed to include things we don't need. We spend money we don't have to buy things we don't need to impress people we don't like. We are no longer satisfied with simple. Although I met a woman and saw her for a time who insisted she was satisfied with and interested in simple, she chose another path. I understand the draw. I was saved from it by God who sent me out as a missionary. During that time, when I was supposed to concentrate on serving Him, I missed the technological explosion that suckered in most of my compatriots, and so because I knew I could deny myself of them for two years, I knew I could do it longer. We are all about things that are not necessary like fame and fortune and felicitation. We need to be popular and important and influential, but we often care only to be seen that way with strangers and friends rather than with our own families. What we need isn't more economic activity. What we need is more community.
I tried to visit both of my neighbors today. The southern one was home, and I knew it, because I watched them drive into their garage and shut the door. I was out cleaning leaves out of my yard. They didn't answer. The other neighbor was recently divorced, and so I know he might be away, but I'll persist, because I have been there and know what it can be like to be alone this time of year. I've been doing it far longer than I ever thought would be true. What I do know is that my neighbors know me. People wave at me when they see me out running or cycling. People call my name when they see me in the stores. Metro Police know about me because I'm the guy who jogs around in my zip code carrying two wrenches. People know me.
The transactions that matter most this time of year do not happen at the register. They happen between the people. Although the movies of the 90s talk about toys and games, they show how rifts are created by the commercial culture between people in our community. Most people are as overdrawn in their emotional bank accounts as they are in their physical banks. These are the transactions that matter most.
I am pleased that I went out last night and spent some time with my kid sister. It will not be long before that will not frequent even if it's possible. I spent time and money on what matters most, and it was well spent. That's the change in commerce we need.
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