Like most of you, sometimes I look back years later at something that didn't work out and thank God that my will was thwarted by a greater wisdom. Several years ago, I fought rather vehemently to get a job with Customs and Border Protection. Due to circumstances at which I can only speculate, I had to escalate this to a Congressional Inquiry through Senator Ensign's office (Senator Reid's office never acted on my request) and was ultimately rejected. During the intervening years, I found several occasions for which to be thankful that things didn't work out as I hoped.
I find the locale to which I would have been assigned unattractive for several reasons. Having helped my brother move to Dallas two summers ago, I don't really care much for their weather. While it gets hot in Vegas, it's not ALSO 80% humid, and so I prefer it to the conditions for summer in Texas. Additionally, my ex wife lived outside Dallas last I heard, and I would not have enjoyed much running into her or being forced to interact with her more frequently due to proximity. Despite bumper stickers encouraging people to "drive friendly" I found the traffic to be worse than that in Vegas, at least for my part, and so I am not sure I would have enjoyed living in Texas.
More to the point, I don't think I would have enjoyed the job. Ever since Obama took office, he has done everything possible to neuter efforts to actually protect American sovereignty. I don't think I would have been ALLOWED to act in the office to which I was appointed with due diligence. I know I would not have enjoyed changing diapers, acting as a babysitter, or putting up with assaults either via molotov cocktails or from gunfire across the border. I would have found it exceptionally difficult to not verbally slander my commander in chief when actions of his administration undermined my responsibilities as a government agent. Drug dealers are sneaking in during the chaos, leading to more crime and risk for CBP and ICE agents, and I would probably found it not worth the risk. Maybe you remember the agent who went to prison for shooting a man who turned out to be a known cartel member.
As you know from reading my blog, I speak my mind without reservation. My father long warned me about the dangers of going on the record with strong opinions, and although I think he esteems me for it, I don't think he would support me going to jail for speaking out about the administration's lawlessness. I would not have tolerated the notion that the nation's future rests in the descendants of foreigners rather than my own, that their children are somehow more virtuous than any I might have. I would not do this for the descendants of foreigners; it would be for mine. The liberals like to claim it's for the children while their actions lead to unexpected lasciviousness. Virtuous ends cannot come from means that lack virtue. What is virtuous about importing hordes of uneducated, illiterate poor into this nation? How are takers more virtuous than makers? Is the grasshopper somehow more noble than the ant? How will this help with jobs?
In short, I would not have enjoyed the job and it would not have ended up making for a good career. Given all of the recent developments as well as my own penchants to mouth off at malversation, I think I would have either been fired for insubordination or resigned in protest. I stand against illegal immigration for the same reason I stand for the rule of law: because of love, for my own family and for my country. This is about MY children. I am compassionate towards my own children, to the children of CBP officers, to the children of citizens who do not have access to a governmental silver spoon and who have to earn their bread by the sweat of their brow. I protest the notion that unless I give away everything I have to people who defy the laws of civil society that I'm a bigot, particularly when those who level those accusations do little to get dirt on their lily white gloves. At the same time they preach shared sacrifice and community, they do everything they can to shove cash into their pockets. Their children are well off, and to hell with yours.
Ironically then, I may one day count it a blessing that I lack posterity. When people tell me I should procreate so that when I die someone survives me who understands and appreciates and supports the high-minded ideals to which I aspire, I tell them that the best revenge I can take on a world that despises virtue is to leave it to figure out its own problems. Why should I burden my children with the work necessary to clean up the mess made by people who "mean well" but never shoulder responsibility? Why is that my problem or theirs? How would that be compassion towards my children? I can only impact a handful of children and touch hundreds of other lives briefly. How will that poor effort stem the tide of lawlessness and licentiousness? I don't know how to prepare them to live in the world that is. I eschew gadgets and live in the past, and I'm in my 30s. I tell people routinely that the things I know are not much use in the real world. I know more about what ought to be than what is.
Consequently, when I pray, which is frequently, I thank God for unanswered prayers. I know that many things would not have turned out as I like. I don't think CBP would have been a career. I would probably be back searching for a new job now, and as much as I would have liked the pay, I think ti would have frustrated me, and I doubt I'd be working as a professor. However disappointed though I may be by the path of the last few years, I think this one worked out better for me. I hope that other aspects that remain as yet unclear and unsatisfied also resolve themselves into similar clarity so that I can appropriately thank God for protecting me from what I want when it is otherwise.
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