Last Tuesday night while I waited for the meeting to start that I attend every week, I overheard a conversation that made my blood boil. Although I held my tongue, I came this -- close to speaking my mind to the women immediately adjacent.
I know none of them personally and only one of them by name. Despite being no more than six feet away from me, they made no attempt to hush their comments or keep it to themselves. Immediately prior to the comment, the youngest of the women remarked that she would of course be able to make it to such-and-such because she had no children, to which the eldest among them (and the only one whose name I knew) quipped, "I wish I could say that."
To be fair, this woman was previously married in an abusive relationship. However, I have always been struck by how stern she seems, even when she is "happiest", born apparently of bitterness towards a previous relationship. It also manifests in misogynistic comments she makes denigrating her current husband whom she ostensibly loves. Some people have no interest having children.
Her children are not responsible for the way her husband treated her. A close friend of mine was physically abused by her mother because she reminded her mother of the father who cheated on her mother. When innocents bear the brunt, there is no excuse for that.
How could any woman wish she had not had her children? They are a part of her. She is a part of them. I have about a dozen friends who consider me their surrogate parent because their parents admitted in a moment of weakness that they were accidents. How can you accidentally have a child? I admit abstinence isn't easy, but I am proud to say there are no illegitimate children of mine out there and that any woman who claims I had sex with her or anything like unto it who is not my former wife is a liar.
I would give all that I have for a family. I wish this woman would realize how blessed she is. Any biological can donate a gamete, but it takes a human being to be a parent.
I know none of them personally and only one of them by name. Despite being no more than six feet away from me, they made no attempt to hush their comments or keep it to themselves. Immediately prior to the comment, the youngest of the women remarked that she would of course be able to make it to such-and-such because she had no children, to which the eldest among them (and the only one whose name I knew) quipped, "I wish I could say that."
To be fair, this woman was previously married in an abusive relationship. However, I have always been struck by how stern she seems, even when she is "happiest", born apparently of bitterness towards a previous relationship. It also manifests in misogynistic comments she makes denigrating her current husband whom she ostensibly loves. Some people have no interest having children.
Her children are not responsible for the way her husband treated her. A close friend of mine was physically abused by her mother because she reminded her mother of the father who cheated on her mother. When innocents bear the brunt, there is no excuse for that.
How could any woman wish she had not had her children? They are a part of her. She is a part of them. I have about a dozen friends who consider me their surrogate parent because their parents admitted in a moment of weakness that they were accidents. How can you accidentally have a child? I admit abstinence isn't easy, but I am proud to say there are no illegitimate children of mine out there and that any woman who claims I had sex with her or anything like unto it who is not my former wife is a liar.
I would give all that I have for a family. I wish this woman would realize how blessed she is. Any biological can donate a gamete, but it takes a human being to be a parent.
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