Here’s a different reason why Bernie Sander’s plan to give
free college is a bad idea. Giving out
free college will actually create homeless meccas on college campi. Each semester, we have at least one homeless
person enrolled as a student. I know
this because the police have asked me, since I’m here at 8AM and don’t leave
sometimes until after 11PM, if I’m homeless.
Well, actually they ask me if I ever leave campus. I learned from speaking to the police that as
long as they are enrolled students, they can be on campus. Three terms back, we had a gentleman living
in a camper in the parking lot, and another gentleman dragged three suitcases
around with him all day between/around his class schedule, and then there was
the girl who was still there as of last Friday.
Some homeless people have figured out how to not be homeless- by
attending college. For the cost of at
least one academic credit, they have a place to live, and if they only take one
credit per term, they can live here for many years. It’s a great deal for them but a raw deal for
everyone else.
Right now, the cost of a single academic credit runs them
about $120/term meaning that for
$360/year, they reap all the benefits.
These include but are not limited to: access to drinking water, air
conditioning/heating, bathrooms, internet/wifi, and free goodies. Our campus now offers a student pantry to
provide toiletries and food so that they don’t even have to buy groceries, and
I think they also provide clothes if you need them. If the homeless want, they can pay an
additional $20 per semester for access to the gym so they can shower, and we
have free lockers in some of the older hallways that they use to keep their
stuff. They can even use their student
ID for discounts at their favorite stores and watering holes! All the toilet paper I want for free! Plus student prices on software, iphones,
headphones, travel, etc. I don’t know if they have to earn a grade or
even finish the class. As far as I know,
as long as they are enrolled, they can be here whenever the building is
open. It’s a public building, but if you’re
enrolled as a student (or you work here), the campus police cannot run you off
campus.
As this dawned on me Sunday night talking to my parents, I
calculated the money I could save if I lived on campus. Since I work there, I could simply keep a cot
in my office, use the bathroom in the hallway, get all the water I like, save
10% on gym memberships on campus, groom myself, bathe myself, get free food,
park in the parking lot all the time, have police patrol my “home” regularly,
and have access to free utilities, especially internet. I could save almost $12000 per year if I
lived on campus, and I could even take the classes for free because I’m an
employee and live here for free until I retire.
Essentially, this means I could
save that much money while taxpayers not only pay my salary but also subsidize
my standard of living. The only government subsidy that exceeds the
generosity of this arrangement is prison, but I can live here without the
shivs, chains, and gangs. This is a very
good deal for the homeless and a very bad deal for taxpayers.
If college becomes free, I predict even more homeless people
will move onto campus. Eventually
college will become awash with homeless people.
If we don’t think this through and not realize what could happen, many
people could take over our lives and then what incentive is there to get a job,
buy your own house, live your own life, and pay for anything? If college is free, then so will all these
other things be for more people. Free
college will attract good people, but it will also attract more dregs, because
right now, they have to come up with the money to apply, enroll, and try to
make headway. They may never graduate
because they don’t have to, and they may never become productive because all
their needs are met. The very premise of
liberal socialists that “education is an investment in our future” is a red
herring if the people who attend college never intend to put to use what they
do here for anything more than the bare necessities of life. Plus, it’s not like they can’t get a job and
earn money and live here for free. The
terms are- take a class, and you have carte blanche access to the campus when
term is in session. As long as the
building is open, you can at least sit in the hallways and use the facilities,
and you’ll never have to go out into the real world and pay taxes. It calls to mind this old college humor skit with
the punch line “Joke’s on you dad. I’m never going to get a job.”
As far as I know, the longest any homeless person has lived
on campus is four years, but she is still here now. On weekends, I don’t see her, but during the
day, you can often find her sleeping on benches upstairs, calm in the assurance
of police protection and creature comforts.
What about the rest of us? One of
our great Founding Fathers, to which Mr. Sanders doesn’t even hold a candle,
said, “That which we obtain easily, we esteem lightly.” If some of our less illustrious denizens have
already figured out how to play the system, how many more will follow suit if
they don’t have to pay ANYTHING to go to college? I can see college campi utterly awash with
the homeless in short order as they are already a problem, because if they are
enrolled in college, we can’t just load them into buses and send them over the
border to decrease the homeless population of our state as many places
out west already do. Easily
available things are often and quickly cheapened. That’s why Wal-mart products are usually
considered synonymous with junk. So, if
Sanders manages to make college free, the degree will be worth about as much as
the paper on which it’s written and about as useful.
